I don't think I've got bad taste. I've got no taste.
I've heard other gay people say when they were growing up they felt 'foreign.' Growing up, I was able to label these feelings as: 'I'm a Protestant.' It wasn't until I left, I thought: 'Oh, those weren't Protestant feelings.'
A good rule to remember for life is that when it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain.
One of the great things about being gay and out is that the papers couldn't care less about your love life.
The BBC is a victim of its own independence.
I am really bad at actually interviewing people.
A comedian's a comedian. They're a very kind of cynical bunch. I guess that's why I like them.
I bet Maurice Gibb's heart monitor was singing the tune of Stayin' Alive.
I don't think anyone wants to be gay.
Straight men just can't imagine the bliss of being in a relationship with someone who finds farting as funny as they do.
I do get pleasure from very inconsequential things, like shopping for clothes.
I am very quick to judge.
In my experience the difference between a straight and a bisexual is about four pints
Do I have more depth than I'm given credit for? No!
I don't think you should have to try to be nice, I think most people are nice. I think being cheerful and nice is just a politeness.
All these people I interview are worth ten times what I'm worth.
I've so exceeded what I ever wanted to do.
I loved Lucille Ball growing up.
An awful lot of female celebrities are very beautiful whereas a lot of male celebrities are not so hot.
All my day is spent dealing with other people. When I come home I like it to be empty. The presence of others in my house kind of annoys me. I love coming home and shutting the doors. I feel brain dead. I'm relatively available, but not to live with.
The only people who are desperate to go on the show are people we're desperate not to have on the show.
I'm actually quite self-sufficient, so it might look as if there isn't room for anyone in my life. That isn't entirely the case.
I'm often dating people, but I don't say it because you sort of know it won't last long.
I'd like to retire at 50 but I don't want to sell papers in the middle of London on a Zimmer.
I was a failed actor but I still wanted to show off, so I ended up doing live comedy.
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