A good rule to remember for life is that when it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain.
I have nothing to say about my childhood. It was a perfectly pleasant upbringing - it's not like it was unhappy or anything.
One of the great things about being gay and out is that the papers couldn't care less about your love life.
I've heard other gay people say when they were growing up they felt 'foreign.' Growing up, I was able to label these feelings as: 'I'm a Protestant.' It wasn't until I left, I thought: 'Oh, those weren't Protestant feelings.'
I always say I'd rather be miserable by myself than unhappy in a relationship.
A comedian's a comedian. They're a very kind of cynical bunch. I guess that's why I like them.
I am really bad at actually interviewing people.
All my day is spent dealing with other people. When I come home I like it to be empty. The presence of others in my house kind of annoys me. I love coming home and shutting the doors. I feel brain dead. I'm relatively available, but not to live with.
I bet Maurice Gibb's heart monitor was singing the tune of Stayin' Alive.
I don't think I've got bad taste. I've got no taste.
The BBC is a victim of its own independence.
I am camp. Lots of gay men can't cope with their campness. They are in denial about it.
The higher your profile becomes, the more aware you are that people out there might hate you.
I don't think anyone wants to be gay.
I was a failed actor but I still wanted to show off, so I ended up doing live comedy.
My parents grew up working class, but in that way that working class families do, they spent a fortune on education to better me.
Straight men just can't imagine the bliss of being in a relationship with someone who finds farting as funny as they do.
Because society places a value on masculinity, gay men aspire to it. If you go to a gay club and the doorman says, 'You do realise this is a gay club, don't you lads?' you get all excited because you think, 'Wow, he thought I was straight!'
Well, certainly I think American television is - that's proper TV.
I do get pleasure from very inconsequential things, like shopping for clothes.
I am very quick to judge.
In my experience the difference between a straight and a bisexual is about four pints
Do I have more depth than I'm given credit for? No!
I don't think you should have to try to be nice, I think most people are nice. I think being cheerful and nice is just a politeness.
An awful lot of female celebrities are very beautiful whereas a lot of male celebrities are not so hot.
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