Tucker Max Quotes - Page 2

Quotes about:

• The general intellectual level of South Florida is somewhere just above "functionally retarded".

  Tucker Max

  Florida, Intellectual, Levels

  Tucker Max (2012). “Hilarity Ensues”, p.289, Simon and Schuster

  13 Copy quote

• I'm sorry, but I stand by my decision. I am now a member of the elite club of people that have fought a professional team mascot. You sir, are not in that club.

  Tucker Max

  Sorry, Team, People

  "Tucker goes to hockey game, causes trouble". "I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell" by Max Tucker, January 2006.

  12 Copy quote

• Hi. I haven't insulted you yet, have I?

  Tucker Max

  Insulted, Havens

  "I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell". Book by Tucker Max, 2006.

  15 Copy quote

• You know that look a cop gives you when he's so confused that he doesn't even know how to respond? If you don't know that look, it means you haven't had enough fun in your life.

  Tucker Max

  Fun, Confused, Mean

  Tucker Max (2011). “Assholes Finish First”, p.22, Simon and Schuster

  9 Copy quote

• You look like the type of people who would criticize a misspelling in a suicide note.

  Tucker Max

  Suicide, People, Looks

  Tucker Max (2012). “Sloppy Seconds: The Tucker Max Leftovers”, p.18, Blue Heeler Books

  12 Copy quote

• I stop paying attention because as much as I love beauty, I hate stupidity, and seeing the two combined pisses me off.

  Tucker Max

  Hate, Two, Stupidity

  Tucker Max (2011). “I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell”, p.132, Citadel

  15 Copy quote

• I’ve heard 14 year old meth addicted thai prostitutes say more prescient things than the woman that was supposedly a “professor

  Tucker Max

  Years, Thai, Professors

  15 Copy quote

• The narcissist act is not an act. I actually am a narcissist, very much so. My world revolves around me.

  Tucker Max

  World, Narcissist

  17 Copy quote

• My path to wisdom began when I stopped pretending to know things I didn't know. When I explicitly admitted to the limits of my knowledge, stopped building on ambiguity and ignorance, and instead realized that I knew nothing, not even the things I thought I knew.

  Tucker Max

  Ignorance, Limits, Path

  11 Copy quote

• That's the beauty of alcohol. If you don't remember it, it didn't happen.

  Tucker Max

  Alcohol, Remember, Happens

  Tucker Max (2011). “I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell”, p.96, Citadel

  6 Copy quote

• The dumbest women I hooked up with were in Florida. I lived in Florida for a year... and it was just shocking. I literally felt like after living there for a couple months that I had become stupider. It was unbelievable. If you read the stories on my site that are based around crazy women, about 75 percent of those women were in Florida… and I only lived there for a year.

  Tucker Max

  Couple, Crazy, Florida

  "Uncommon Interview: Tucker Max". Interview with Jen Glickel, www.chicagomaroon.com. May 17, 2005.

  7 Copy quote

• I don't want to compare myself to Picasso, but he had four or five periods in his life. Any good artist grows and changes and matures.

  Tucker Max

  Artist, Four, Want

  10 Copy quote

• Yes, the road to hell is paved with good intentions, but everyone forgets the second half of that quote: the road to heaven is paved with good actions.

  Tucker Max

  Heaven, Half, Action

  8 Copy quote

• Probably the best explanation for my success and other Internet writers, is that we're tapping a genre or a niche out there that needs to be filled and isn't.

  Tucker Max

  Needs, Niche, Internet

  Source: www.foxnews.com

  11 Copy quote

• The only thing that someone could say about me that would hurt me would be something that's true that I don't want to be.

  Tucker Max

  Hurt, Would Be, Want

  Source: www.complex.com

  7 Copy quote

• If people try to judge you or shame you for doing safe, consensual things that make you happy, I can guarantee you they're bad people.

  Tucker Max

  People, Judging, Judgement

  Tucker Max (2011). “Assholes Finish First”, p.252, Simon and Schuster

  15 Copy quote

• The thing that I think about the most, and is the most rewarding to me, is the whole past. That I kind of went from nothing to something and I did it on my own, and I did it through hard work and smarts.

  Tucker Max

  Smart, Hard Work, Thinking

  Source: www.complex.com

  9 Copy quote

• Things always work out for me because I do whatever I want without worrying about the consequences.

  Tucker Max

  Work Out, Worry, Max

  Tucker Max (2012). “Hilarity Ensues”, p.97, Simon and Schuster

  10 Copy quote

• Corporate tweets are like one robot talking to another.

  Tucker Max

  Talking, Robots, Tweet

  4 Copy quote

• People have proven over and over that they will read if they are given something they like. The problem with reading is not reading, its that almost everything out there sucks. For so long, publishing has been run by a cartel of snobby pseudo-intellectual failed writers, and the resulting output has reflected not what the market wants, but what they think people are supposed to read.

  Tucker Max

  Running, Reading, Thinking

  Source: www.blogher.com

  8 Copy quote

• No one has probably helped me more with my narcissism than my dog.

  Tucker Max

  Dog, Narcissistic, Narcissism

  8 Copy quote

• We had become those guys... who started a fight... at a Harry Potter book party.

  Tucker Max

  Party, Book, Fighting

  "Sloppy Seconds: The Tucker Max Leftovers". Book by Tucker Max, 2012.

  7 Copy quote

• I started writing because it was about making my friends laugh, and when you're talking to your friends, you can't bullshit.

  Tucker Max

  Writing, Talking, Bullshit

  Source: www.complex.com

  7 Copy quote

• Yinzer: DAMN!! I wish I had your balls! Tucker:"I wish you had a breath mint, but I guess we don't always get what we wish for.

  Tucker Max

  Wish, Balls, Mint

  Tucker Max (2011). “Assholes Finish First”, p.230, Simon and Schuster

  7 Copy quote

• If your parents ignored you, or if they are just not emotionally available, or if they yell a lot, that is a type of trauma.

  Tucker Max

  Parent, Ignored, Type

  10 Copy quote

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