Henry Cloud Quotes About Boundaries

Quotes about: Boundaries

• We change our behavior when the pain of staying the same becomes greater than the pain of changing. Consequences give us the pain that motivates us to change.

  Henry Cloud

  Inspirational, Motivational, Change

  FaceBook post by Henry Cloud from Dec 22, 2016

• The twin sister to autonomy and freedom is responsibility and accountability. You cannot have one with out the other. If someone is given an area of responsibility, not only must they be set free to do it, they must also be held accountable for what they do. Accountability clarifies freedom. In the teams and companies where you see boundary confusion, power struggles, control, over-reaching of one's line of responsibility, you will also see lapses in accountability as well.

  Henry Cloud

  Team, Struggle, Responsibility

• Boundaries are basically about providing structure, and structure is essential in building anything that thrives.

  Henry Cloud

  Essentials, Boundaries, Building

  Source: tonymorganlive.com

• Don't go overboard in praising required behavior: 'We have only done our duty' (Luke 17:10). But do go overboard when your child confesses the truth, repents honestly, takes chances, and loves openly. Praise the developing character in your child as it emerges in active, loving, responsible behavior.

  Henry Cloud

  Children, Character, Parenting

  Henry Cloud, John Townsend (2009). “Boundaries with Kids: When to Say Yes, How to Say No”, p.115, Zondervan

• When we begin to set boundaries with people we love, a really hard thing happens: they hurt. They may feel a hole where you used to plug up their aloneness, their disorganization, or their financial irresponsibility. Whatever it is, they will feel a loss. If you love them, this will be difficult for you to watch. But, when you are dealing with someone who is hurting, remember that your boundaries are both necessary for you and helpful for them. If you have been enabling them to be irresponsible, your limit setting may nudge them toward responsibility.

  Henry Cloud

  Hurt, Responsibility, Loss

  FaceBook post by Henry Cloud from Mar 03, 2016

• One of the first signs that you’re beginning to develop boundaries is a sense of resentment, frustration, or anger at the subtle and not-so-subtle violations in your life. Just as radar signals the approach of a foreign missile, your anger can alert you to boundary violations in your life.

  Henry Cloud

  Frustration, Firsts, Resentment

  Henry Cloud, John Townsend (2017). “Boundaries Updated and Expanded Edition: When to Say Yes, How to Say No To Take Control of Your Life”, p.170, Zondervan

• Values are sometimes worth living and dying for, and are certainly worth dating and breaking up over.

  Henry Cloud

  Dating, Dying, Sometimes

• When we can't hold back, or set boundaries, on what comes from our lips, our words are in charge-not us. But we are still responsible for those words. Our words do not come from somewhere outside of us, as if we were a ventriloquist's dummy. They are the product of our hearts. Our saying, "I didn't mean that," is probably better translated, "I didn't want you to know I thought that about you." We need to take responsibility for our words. "But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken" (Matt. 12:36).

  Henry Cloud

  Mean, Responsibility, Heart

• Leave your pride, ego, and narcissism somewhere else. Reactions from those parts of you will reinforce your children's most primitive fears.

  Henry Cloud

  Children, Pride, Parenting

  Henry Cloud, John Townsend (2009). “Boundaries with Kids: When to Say Yes, How to Say No”, p.152, Harper Collins

• If your boundary training consists only of words, you are wasting your breath. But if you 'do' boundaries with your kids, they internalize the experiences, remember them, digest them, and make them part of how they see reality.

  Henry Cloud

  Kids, Parenting, Reality

  Henry Cloud, John Townsend (2009). “Boundaries with Kids: When to Say Yes, How to Say No”, p.37, Harper Collins

• Training moments occur when both parents and children do their jobs. The parent's job is to make the rule. The child's job is to break the rule. The parent then corrects and disciplines. The child breaks the rule again, and the parent manages the consequences and empathy that then turn the rule into reality and internal structure for the child.

  Henry Cloud

  Jobs, Children, Reality

  Henry Cloud, John Townsend (2009). “Boundaries with Kids: When to Say Yes, How to Say No”, p.151, Harper Collins

• The idea of submission is never meant to allow someone to overstep another's boundaries. Submission only has meaning in the context of boundaries, for boundaries promote self-control and freedom. If a wife is not free and in control of herself, she is not submitting anyway. She is a slave subject to a slave driver, and she is out of the will of God.

  Henry Cloud

  Self, Ideas, Wife

  Henry Cloud, John Townsend (2002). “Boundaries in Marriage”, p.248, Zondervan

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