Eddie Izzard Quotes - Page 2

Quotes about:

• I'm into humanity. I don't believe in God, but I believe in human beings.

  Eddie Izzard

  Believe, Humanity, Humans

  14 Copy quote

• Scrabble was invented by Nazis to piss off kids with dyslexia. This is true, they proved this one. The word dyslexia was invented by Nazis to piss off kids with dyslexia.

  Eddie Izzard

  Funny, Kids, Scrabble

  "Eddie Izzard: Stripped". Documentary, Comedy, 2009.

  8 Copy quote

• Because we all know one of the main factors of war is the element of surprise. And what could be more surprising than the First Batallion Transvestite Brigade? Airborne Wing.

  Eddie Izzard

  War, Wings, Elements

  12 Copy quote

• MAC gave me 55 lipsticks to test. These are the same lipsticks I got caught stealing by the police when I was 15. How ironic.

  Eddie Izzard

  Police, Ironic, Tests

  19 Copy quote

• If you get anything creative going, then the work and play thing is the same thing, I feel.

  Eddie Izzard

  Play, Creative, Feels

  "Straight talking" by Straight talking, www.theguardian.com. December 1, 2008.

  13 Copy quote

• I like my coffee like I like my women. In a plastic cup.

  Eddie Izzard

  Funny, Witty, Coffee

  "Eddie Izzard: Glorious". Video, www.imdb.com. 1997.

  17 Copy quote

• If there were a god, don't you think he would have flicked Hitler's head off?

  Eddie Izzard

  Thinking, Religion, Ifs

  8 Copy quote

• Cats have a scam going - you buy the food, they eat the food, they go away; that's the deal.

  Eddie Izzard

  Cat, Going Away, Scams

  Twitter post from Feb 3, 2015

  17 Copy quote

• Scrabble was invented by Nazis to piss off kids with dyslexia.

  Eddie Izzard

  Kids, Scrabble, Nazi

  "Eddie Izzard: Stripped". Documentary, Comedy, 2009.

  8 Copy quote

• Danger could be my middle name... But it's John.

  Eddie Izzard

  Names, Danger, Middle

  "Lust for Glorious". www.imdb.com. 1997.

  10 Copy quote

• Racist people, interestingly, are never as polite as smokers. Have you noticed that? Smokers always go, "Do you mind if I smoke? Oh, you do? Okay, I'll go outside and have a cigarette."

  Eddie Izzard

  People, Mind, Racist

  "Eddie Izzard: Sexie". Documentary, Comedy, 2003.

  6 Copy quote

• The Pope is guarded by the Swiss guard who stand proudly in pajamas and silly hats.

  Eddie Izzard

  Silly, Hats, Pajamas

  7 Copy quote

• We will now sing forth, hymn 405, 'Oh God, what on earth is my hairdo all about?

  Eddie Izzard

  Hymns, Earth, Hairdos

  4 Copy quote

• I appreciate your applause, but I don't do it for applause. I do it for cash, it's much better.

  Eddie Izzard

  Money, Appreciate, Cash

  "Eddie Izzard: Unrepeatable". www.imdb.com. 1994.

  4 Copy quote

• When you're more mature, you do start telling the truth, in odd situations. "I'm sorry, I've broken a glass here. Is that expensive? I'll pay for it. I'm sorry." And you do that so that people in the room might go, "What a strong personality that person has. I like to have sex with people with strong personalities."

  Eddie Izzard

  Strong, Sex, Sorry

  "Eddie Izzard: Dress to Kill". Documentary, www.imdb.com. June 13, 1999.

  6 Copy quote

• Father, bless me for I have sinned, I did an original sin… I poked a badger with a spoon.

  Eddie Izzard

  Father, Spoons, Sin

  8 Copy quote

• Cake and tea or death?

  Eddie Izzard

  Cake, Tea

  7 Copy quote

• You say 'erbs, and we say Herbs because there's a f*****g H in it!

  Eddie Izzard

  Sarcastic, Herbs

  "Eddie Izzard: Dress to Kill". Documentary, Comedy, 1998.

  5 Copy quote

• My sexuality is straight transvestite or male lesbian. It seems we are beyond the idea that I am gay and hiding it. If I had to describe how I feel in my head, I'd say I'm a complete boy plus half a girl. I don't seem to have the sixth sense that women have or their stronger senses of taste and smell. Gay men can also have it but straight men don't.

  Eddie Izzard

  Girl, Gay, Men

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

  10 Copy quote

• Your eyes flashed fire into my soul. I immediately read the words of Dostoyevsky and Karl Marx, and in the words of Albert Schweitzer, I FANCY YOU!

  Eddie Izzard

  Eye, Fire, Soul

  "Eddie Izzard: Dress to Kill". Documentary, Comedy, 1999.

  11 Copy quote

• It's a historical thing, up to the 19th century the English hated the French. Then in the 20th century the English started to hate the Germans - as we began to move alphabetically through the map of the world. Now, the year 2000, we are fine with the Germans... but the Hungarians are pissing us off.

  Eddie Izzard

  Hate, Moving, Years

  7 Copy quote

• If you think about determination, if people have a heart and are determined, they can get to that place. But there are a lot of negative people who were enormously determined. All the Nazis were determined. They wanted to murder everyone. Everyone with a bad heart, who doesn't care about people, I wish they hadn't started.

  Eddie Izzard

  Determination, Heart, Thinking

  "I Believe That Eddie Izzard Is Our Future". Interview with Ali MacLean, www.huffingtonpost.com. August 16, 2010.

  10 Copy quote

• My dad said, "As long as you're happy." I used to think it was kind of a very simple idea or philosophy because he wasn't religious. But you've got to try and be happy. And if you're not happy, you can't help anyone else. So obviously, some crazy people could go to places, but I just think you need to be content within yourself, so that's the thing.

  Eddie Izzard

  Religious, Dad, Philosophy

  4 Copy quote

• I wanna live 'til I die, no more, no less.

  Eddie Izzard

  Comedy, Dies

  7 Copy quote

• I'm working on a speed boat at the moment. Much more exciting. It'll really kick ass, give great photographs for the people in Bible.

  Eddie Izzard

  People, Giving, Kick Ass

  "Eddie Izzard: Glorious". Documentary, Comedy, 1997.

  11 Copy quote

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