There is no bad whiskey. There are only some whiskeys that aren't as good as others.
Reality is an illusion created by a lack of alcohol.
Here's to alcohol, the rose colored glasses of life.
If four or five guys tell you that you're drunk, even though you know you haven't had a thing to drink, the least you can do is to lie down a little while.
It is most absurdly said, in popular language, of any man, that he is disguised in liquor; for, on the contrary, most men are disguised by sobriety.
I fear the man who drinks water and so remembers this morning what the rest of us said last night
You can only drink 30 or 40 glasses of beer a day, no matter how rich you are.
One martini is all right. Two are too many, and three are not enough.
I've never been drunk, but often I've been overserved.
One reason I don't drink is that I want to know when I am having a good time.
O God, that men should put an enemy in their mouths to steal away their brains!" - Cassio (Act II, Scene iii)
Writer's block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they can have an excuse to drink alcohol.
I drink exactly as much as I want, and one drink more.
Why is American beer served cold? So you can tell it from urine.
To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a "support group". Salvation in a can!
I began to think vodka was my drink at last. It didn’t taste like anything, but it went straight down into my stomach like a sword swallowers’ sword and made me feel powerful and godlike.
Drinking beer doesn't make you fat, it makes you lean...Against bars, tables, chairs, and poles.
Too much of anything is bad, but too much Champagne is just right.
An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.
Everybody's got to believe in something. I believe I'll have another beer.
I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates when he said...I drank what?
Why don't you get out of that wet coat and into a dry martini?
Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with that it's compounding a felony.
Now don't say you can't swear off drinking; it's easy. I've done it a thousand times.
I drank to drown my sorrows, but the damned things learned how to swim.
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