Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.
It's been so long since I made love, I can't even remember who gets tied up.
Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it.
The night has a thousand eyes, And the day but one; Yet the light of the bright world dies, With the dying sun. The mind has a thousand eyes, And the heart but one; Yet the light of a whole life dies, When love is done.
Like good wine, marriage gets better with age - once you learn to keep a cork in it.
If somebody says, "I love you," to me, I feel as though I had a pistol pointed at my head. What can anybody reply under such conditions but that which the pistol-holder requires? "I love you, too."
Honesty is the key to a relationship. If you can fake that, you're in.
In love, somehow, a man's heart is always either exceeding the speed limit, or getting parked in the wrong place.
Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else in the house.
You know you're in love when you stop comparing.
As husbands, I think one reason we have some trouble with Paul's command to love our wives "as Christ loved the church," is that we don't really fully know how Christ loves the church.
Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves.
When one door closes, another one opens, but sometimes we wait too long looking at the closed door, and never realize that another door has been opened.
The art of love is largely the art of persistence.
To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.
Men always want to be a woman's first love - women like to be a man's last romance.
Sex without love is an empty experience, but as empty experiences go, it's one of the best.
I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she'll kill me.
You call it madness, but I call it love.
Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not.
You have to walk carefully in the beginning of love; the running across fields into your lover's arms can only come later when you're sure they won't laugh if you trip.
Nothing takes the taste out of peanut butter quite like unrequited love.
I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house.
People should fall in love with their eyes closed.
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