It is difficult to produce a television documentary that is both incisive and probing when every twelve minutes one is interrupted by twelve dancing rabbits singing about toilet paper.
France is a place where the money falls apart in your hands but you can't tear the toilet paper.
Today you can go to a gas station and find the cash register open and the toilets locked. They must think toilet paper is worth more than money.
It's not hard to tell we was poor - when you saw the toilet paper dryin' on the clothesline.
When somebody follows you 20 blocks to the pharmacy, where they watch you buy toilet paper, you know your life has changed.
I propose a limitation be put on how many squares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting.
I like getting toilet paper thrown at me.
I can say with a solid degree of authority that I am a selfish person. I spontaneously forget the names of more people than not, unless I want to make out with them. I will take the last square of toilet paper off the roll without thinking twice. I tip taxi drivers so poorly I'm amazed none of them have run over my foot while speeding off.
You can almost judge how screwed up somebody is by the kind of toilet paper they use. Go in any rich house and it's some weird coloured embossed stuff.
Before you rip off three feet of toilet paper, consider that each year 500,000 acres of virgin boreal forest in northern Alberta and Ontario are being clear-cut to make the stuff. These forests are home to some 500 First Nation communities, as well as caribou and bears, moose and wolves, and, in the summertime, billions of songbirds.
Endangered forests are being slaughtered for toilet paper
The last time I was in Spain I got through six Jeffrey Archer novels. I must remember to take enough toilet paper next time.
Most of the time he [Marlon Brando] sounds like he has a mouth full of toilet paper.
Can't nobody [mess] with me. I'm like toilet paper, Pampers and toothpaste. I'm definitely proven to be effective.
I've always loved 3D. In fact, as a kid, I was exposed to 3D at an early age because my grandfather was a specialist of 3D in cinematheques. And then my cousin put it in 'Science of Sleep' with toilet paper tube cities. But he was a specialist and I always wanted to do something in 3D.
Like when I'm in the bathroom looking at my toilet paper, I'm like 'Wow! That's toilet paper?' I don't know if we appreciate how much we have.
I've learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
I have a very silly sense of humor. I've never laughed harder in my entire life than seeing someone with toilet paper stuck on the bottom of their shoe.
European toilet paper is made from the same material that Americans use for roofing, which is why Europeans tend to remain standing throughout soccer matches.
I have the largest collection of Hulk memorabilia in the world - everything from toilet paper, wallpaper, bicycles - all boxed up at my house in Northern California. I've had it for so long, I think it might be time to sell it.
or simply:
