Beverly Engel Quotes About Abuse

• Critical words to a child are as painful and damaging as being physically hit. They are verbal slaps in the face. Usually, critical words are accompanied by threats, name-calling, and yelling. This verbal abuse can be especially damaging. Insulting names echo in a child's mind over and over again until he comes to believe he is indeed stupid, selfish, lazy, or ugly and that in fact, that is all he is.

  Beverly Engel

  Children, Stupid, Selfish

  Beverly Engel (2002). “The Emotionally Abusive Relationship: How to Stop Being Abused and How to Stop Abusing”, p.71, John Wiley & Sons

• When someone is unrelentingly critical of you, always finds fault, can never be pleased, and blames you for everything that goes wrong, it is the insidious nature and cumulative effects of the abuse that do the damage. Over time, this type of abuse eats away at your self-confidence and sense of self-worth, undermining any good feelings you have about yourself and about your accomplishments .

  Beverly Engel

  Self Confidence, Self Worth, Accomplishment

  Beverly Engel (2002). “The Emotionally Abusive Relationship: How to Stop Being Abused and How to Stop Abusing”, p.29, John Wiley & Sons

• The more you face the truth, the angrier you will probably become. You have a right to be angry about being sexually abused. You have a right to be angry with the perpetrator, regardless of who it was, how long ago the sexual abuse occurred, or how much he/she has changed.

  Beverly Engel

  Long Ago, Abuse, Faces

• With emotional abuse, the insults, insinuations, criticism, and accusations slowly eat away at the victim’s self-esteem until he or she is incapable of judging a situation realistically. He or she may begin to believe that there is something wrong with them or even fear they are losing their mind. They have become so beaten down emotionally that they blame themselves for the abuse.

  Beverly Engel

  Self Esteem, Believe, Emotional

• There are many types of emotional abuse but most is done in an attempt to control or subjugate another person. Emotional abuse is like brainwashing in that it systematically wears away at the victim's self-confidence, sense of self, trust in her perceptions and self-concept.

  Beverly Engel

  Self Confidence, Emotional, Abuse

  "Emotionally Abused Women". Online Chat, www.healthyplace.com.

• Emotional abuse is any type of abuse that is not physical in nature. It can include everything from verbal abuse to the silent treatment, domination to subtle manipulation.

  Beverly Engel

  Emotional, Abuse, Domestic Violence

  "Emotionally Abused Women". Interview with David Roberts, www.healthyplace.com.

• Strong Women never put their safety or their self-esteem aside to please someone else or to keep a man. If someone acts inappropriately or abusively in any way (including becoming emotionally abusive), Strong Women stand up for themselves and make it abundantly clear that they will not tolerate the abuse. If this doesn't work, they walk away.

  Beverly Engel

  Being Yourself, Strong Women, Self Esteem

  Beverly Engel (2011). “AARP The Nice Girl Syndrome: Stop Being Manipulated and Abused--and Start Standing Up for Yourself”, p.2, John Wiley & Sons

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