Paula Poundstone Funny Quotes

Quotes about: Funny

• The problem with cats is that they get the exact same look on their face whether they see a moth or an axe-murderer.

  Paula Poundstone

  Funny, Motivational, Cat

• The wages of sin are death, but by the time taxes are taken out, it's just sort of a tired feeling.

  Paula Poundstone

  Funny, Time, Taken

• I'm thankful for the three ounce Ziploc bag, so that I have somewhere to put my savings.

  Paula Poundstone

  Funny, Three, Bags

  "Thanksgiving Is Not Just for Leftovers" by Paula Poundstone, November 26, 2008.

• My Mom said she learned how to swim when someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat. I said, 'Mom, they weren't trying to teach you how to swim.'

  Paula Poundstone

  Inspirational, Funny, Motivational

• I don't have a bank account because I don't know my mother's maiden name.

  Paula Poundstone

  Funny, Mother, Money

  "On Location: Women of the Night". Comedy, 1987.

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