How will you be remembered? As a loner and a loser.
I'm scared. What will tomorrow bring? It has to be better than today. It has to.
I hope they remember the good stuff, when I was a baby, a toddler, when they still had hopes and dreams for their little girl, their miracle child. In truth they were good to me. They were only doing what they knew how to do; what they thought was best.
I never defended myself. Not once. I never said, "Excuse me? What gives you the right to insult and demean me?" I let them steal my dignity.
Yeah, I loved her. I couldn't help it. She was my brother.
Trust. That was what this was all about. If you can't trust the one you love, you don't have anything.
Secrets. I can't take then with me. If I do, when I go, when I arrive at my final destination, I'll be . . . impure.
No one ever found out what was happening inside me. How the pain was eating me away. No one ever came to my rescue, or stood up for me.
I just want the pain to end.
Because no one can be trusted.
Why are people so cruel? What did I ever do to them?
Everything seems to be working." Except me. I'm broken.
I didn't tell him. And I never told her the whole truth. What would it matter? There was nothing she could do; nothing anyone can do or will do.
You won't know until it's over. You won't find me in time.
That same piercing screech in her voice every time at the hospital. "Do something!" When I slit my wrists. "Help her!" The last time too. "Somebody help her. Help us!" You're helpless, both of you. All of us.
I shouldn't have been there. I should never have been born.
There's always a way out. All you have to do is take it.
Really? It seems too good to be true. I don't trust it. I don't trust anyone.
The sad truth is, they should never trust me.
Year after year. "Please don't make me go [to school]" "You have to go," Kim would say. "It's a new school, make a new start." "Sticks and stones." from Chip. Words will only kill you.
My mother read that parents should spend quality time with their children. One way is to sign up for organized activities together. This month we're taking meditation to free the mind. Last month it was Rolfing. Have you ever Rolfed, Tone?" "Only after the school's shepherd's pie," I said.
Would I cheat to save my soul? No. But to save my G.P.A.? Yes.
Everyone's a liar. Everyone I've ever known.
My room is cleared. My head is cleared. Earlier, around dawn, I took out the last load of trash. I look around and see what's left. Nothing. There is no more Daelyn Rice. As I was. As I am. Or will become. I'm a blank slate
His invitation lingers. So does my question. Why me? I don't know the answer. When I look at myself in the mirror, all I see is a starving, stunted bird who never grew wings and lost all reason to sing.
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