We have two ears and one tongue so that we would listen more and talk less.
In a rich man's house there is no place to spit but his face.
He has the most who is most content with the least.
If only it was as easy to banish hunger by rubbing the belly as it is to masturbate.
I pissed on the man who called me a dog. Why was he so surprised?
One original thought is worth a thousand mindless quotings
Of what use is a philosopher who doesn't hurt anybody's feelings?
It is not that I am mad, it is only that my head is different from yours.
People who talk well but do nothing are like musical intruments; the sound is all they have to offer.
We come into the world alone and we die alone. Why, in life, should we be any less alone?
No man is hurt but by himself. ...Literally by how he interprets what happens to him. If he focusses on how it could have been better, he will be hurt. If he focusses on how it could have been worse, he will be happy. The same is true for women too.
Fools! You think of "god" as a sentient being. God is the word used to represent a force. This force created nothing, it just helps things along. It does not answer prayers, although it may make you think of a way to solve a problem. It has the power to influence you, but not decide for you.
You will become a teacher of yourself when for the same things that you blame others, you also blame yourself.
The most beautiful thing in the world is freedom of speech.
Why not whip the teacher when the pupil misbehaves?
There is only a finger's difference between a wise man and a fool.
We are more curious about the meaning of dreams than about things we see when awake.
Self-taught poverty is a help toward philosophy, for the things which philosophy attempts to teach by reasoning, poverty forces us to practice.
Other dogs bite only their enemies, whereas I bite also my friends in order to save them.
He lit a lamp in broad daylight and said, as he went about, "I am looking for a human."
We have complicated every simple gift of the gods.
A friend is one soul abiding in two bodies.
Discourse on virtue and they pass by in droves. Whistle and dance the shimmy, and you've got an audience.
If you are to be kept right, you must possess either good friends or red-hot enemies. The one will warn you, the other will expose you.
When I look upon seamen, men of science and philosophers, man is the wisest of all beings; when I look upon priests and prophets nothing is as contemptible as man.
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