Terry Pratchett Quotes - Page 15

• Time was something that largely happened to other people; he viewed it in the same way that people on the shore viewed the sea. It was big and it was out there, and sometimes it was an invigorating thing to dip a toe into, but you couldn't live in it all the time. Besides, it always made his skin wrinkle.

  Terry Pratchett

  Wrinkles, Sea, People

  "Thief Of Time". Book by Terry Pratchett, 2001.

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• It's amazing how fast gold works.

  Terry Pratchett

  Gold

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• It is a popular fact that nine-tenths of the brain is not used and, like most popular facts, it is wrong. Not even the most stupid Creator would go to the trouble of making the human head carry around several pounds of unnecessary gray goo if its only real purpose was, for example, to serve as a delicacy for certain remote tribesmen in unexplored valleys.

  Terry Pratchett

  Stupid, Real, Brain

  Terry Pratchett (2008). “Small Gods: (Discworld Novel 13)”, p.91, Random House

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• I'd rather be a rising ape than a falling angel.

  Terry Pratchett

  Fall, Angel, Rising

  Terry Pratchett (2014). “A Slip of the Keyboard: Collected Non-fiction”, p.150, Random House

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• Yes, but people have got to believe that, or what's the point MY POINT EXACTLY.

  Terry Pratchett

  Truth, Believe, People

  Terry Pratchett (2008). “Hogfather: (Discworld Novel 20)”, p.408, Random House

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• Nothing has to be true forever. Just for long enough, to tell you the truth.

  Terry Pratchett

  Long, Forever, Enough

  Terry Pratchett (2014). “The Truth: Stage Adaptation”, p.125, A&C Black

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• I saved a man's life once," said Granny. "Special medicine, twice a day. Boiled water with a bit of berry juice in it. Told him I'd bought it from the dwarves. That's the biggest part of doct'rin, really. Most people'll get over most things if they put their minds to it, you just have to give them an interest.

  Terry Pratchett

  Men, Dwarves, Medicine

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• I'm not the world's greatest expert, but I would have thought that the wizards, witches, trolls, unicorns, ... broomsticks and spells would have given her a clue?' - when J.K. Rowling insisted she wasn't writing fantasy.

  Terry Pratchett

  Writing, Experts, Wizards

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• God moves in extremely mysterious, not to say, circuitous ways. God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable game of His own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, ie., everybody, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch-dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a Dealer who won't tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time.

  Terry Pratchett

  Moving, Dark, Player

  "Good Omens". Book by Neil Gaiman, Terry Pratchett, 1990.

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• What your soldier wants - really, really wants - is no-one shooting back at him.

  Terry Pratchett

  Soldier, Shooting, Want

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• Oh, there's plenty of reasons. I just don't know which one.

  Terry Pratchett

  Reason, Knows, Plenty

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• It was also a room full of books and made of books. There was no actual furniture; this is to say, the desk and chairs were shaped out of books. It looked as though many of them were frequently referred to, because they lay open with other books used as bookmarks.

  Terry Pratchett

  Book, Rooms, Furniture

  Terry Pratchett (2008). “Going Postal: (Discworld Novel 33)”, p.238, Random House

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• Many people, meeting Aziraphale for the first time, formed three impressions: that he was English, that he was intelligent, and that he was gayer than a treeful of monkeys on nitrous oxide.

  Terry Pratchett

  Intelligent, People, Three

  "Good Omens: The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch (Friday)". Book by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman, May 1, 1990.

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• Magicians and scientists are, on the face of it, poles apart. Certainly, a group of people who often dress strangely, live in a world of their own, speak a specialized language and frequently make statements that appear to be in flagrant breach of common sense have nothing in common with a group of people who often dress strangely, speak a specialized language, live in ... er.

  Terry Pratchett

  Common Sense, People, Magic

  "The Science of Discworld". Book by Terry Pratchett, 1999.

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• SCIENCE: a way of finding things out and then making them work. Science explains what is happening around us the whole time. So does RELIGION, but science is better because it comes up with more understandable excuses when it's wrong.

  Terry Pratchett

  Way, Doe, Excuse

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• Of course, Ankh-Morpork's citizens had always claimed that the river water was incredibly pure. Any water that had passed through so many kidneys, they reasoned, had to be very pure indeed.

  Terry Pratchett

  Rivers, Water, Citizens

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• So much paperwork to read! So much paperwork to push away! So much paperwork to pretend he hadn't received and that might have been eaten by gargoyles.

  Terry Pratchett

  Might, Gargoyles, Paperwork

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• It wasn't that Nanny Ogg sang badly. It was just that she could hit notes which, when amplified by a tin bath half full of water, ceased to be sound and became some sort of invasive presence.

  Terry Pratchett

  Water, Sound, Tin

  Terry Pratchett (2008). “Lords And Ladies: (Discworld Novel 14)”, p.188, Random House

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• Unlike wizards, who like nothing better than a complicated hierarchy, witches don't go in much for the structured approach to career progression. It's up to each individual witch to take on a girl to hand the area over to when she dies. Witches are not by nature gregarious, at least with other witches, and they certainly don't have leaders.
  Granny Weatherwax was the most highly-regarded of the leaders they didn't have.

  Terry Pratchett

  Girl, Hands, Careers

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• Omens are everywhere in this world you just have to find the one that fits.

  Terry Pratchett

  World, Fit, This World

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• A marriage is always made up of two people who are prepared to swear that only the other one snores.

  Terry Pratchett

  Two, People, Discworld

  Terry Pratchett (2008). “The Fifth Elephant: (Discworld Novel 24)”, p.123, Random House

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• Many feel they are called to the priesthood, but what they really hear is an inner voice saying, 'It's indoor work with no heavy lifting, do you want to be a ploughman like your father?'

  Terry Pratchett

  Father, Voice, Want

  Terry Pratchett (2008). “Small Gods: (Discworld Novel 13)”, p.31, Random House

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• The thief, as will become apparent, was a special type of thief. This thief was an artist of theft. Other thieves merely stole everything that was not nailed down, but this thief stole the nails as well.

  Terry Pratchett

  Artist, Special, Nails

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• And he dreamed the dream of all those who publish books, which was to have so much gold in your pockets that you would have to employ two people just to hold your trousers up.

  Terry Pratchett

  Dream, Book, Two

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• And so the children of the revolution were faced with the age-old problem: it wasn't that you had the wrong kind of government, which was obvious, but that you had the wrong kind of people. As soon as you saw people as things to be measured, they didn't measure up.

  Terry Pratchett

  Children, Government, People

  Terry Pratchett (2002). “Night watch”, Doubleday UK

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