It isn't enough for an umpire to merely know what he's doing. He has to look as though he knows what he's doing, too.
When I'm right, no one remembers.When I am wrong, no one forgets.
Officiating is the only job in America that everybody knows how to do better than the guy who is doing it.
In a way an umpire is like a woman. He makes quick decisions, never reverses them, and doesn't think you're safe when you're out.
People come to see the players. Nobody ever bought a ticket to see a manager.
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