I never questioned the integrity of an umpire. Their eyesight, yes.
It isn't enough for an umpire to merely know what he's doing. He has to look as though he knows what he's doing, too.
The best umpired game is the game in which the fans cannot recall the umpires who worked it.
Any umpire who claims he has never missed a play is . . . well, an umpire.
Boys, I'm one of those umpires that misses 'em every once in a while so if it's close, you'd better hit it.
Your job is to umpire for the ball and not the player.
Peace is the umpire for doing the will of God.
Umpires, like players, are expected to show constant improvement each season and at each level. Inconsistent plate work and the inability to handle situations are probably the two biggest problems that minor league umpires face.
The most cowardly thing in the world is blaming mistakes upon the umpires. Too many managers strut around on the field trying to manage the umpires instead of their teams.
I made a game effort to argue but two things were against me: the umpires and the rules.
Umpire's heaven is a place where he works third base every game. Home is where the heartache is.
In a way an umpire is like a woman. He makes quick decisions, never reverses them, and doesn't think you're safe when you're out.
Umpires are most vigorous when defending their miscalls.
In the olden days, the umpire didn't have to take any courses in mind reading. The pitcher told you he was going to throw at you.
My favorite umpire is a dead one.
Step outside the guidelines of the official umpires and make your own rules and your own reality.
Minor league umpires are evaluated in their respective leagues each year and rated numerically. This enables umpires to know where they stand and helps them make prudent career decisions.
I told the umpires to walk back at least thirty-five feet from home plate. That reduced the arguements.
The trouble with women umpires is that I couldn't argue with one. I'd put my arms around her and give her a little kiss.
I'd always have it (grease( in at least two places, in case the umpires would ask me to wipe one off. I never wanted to be caught out there with anything though, it wouldn't be professional.
If either player abandon the game by quitting the table in anger, or in an otherwise offensive manner; or by momentarily resigning the game; or refuses to abide by the decision of the Umpire, the game must be scored against him.
Many baseball fans look upon an umpire as a sort of necessary evil to the luxury of baseball, like the odor that follows an automobile.
Now that women are jockeys, baseball umpires, atomic scientists, and business executives, maybe someday they can master parallel parking.
No accurate thinker will judge another person by that which the other person's enemies say about him.
The existence of a free market does not of course eliminate the need for government. On the contrary, government is essential both as a forum for determining the "rule of the game" and as an umpire to interpret and enforce the rules decided on.
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