Carl Hiaasen Quotes - Page 2

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• I think in the old days, the nexus of weirdness ran through Southern California, and to a degree New York City. I think it's changed so that every bizarre story in the country now has a Florida connection. I don't know why, except it must be some inversion of magnetic poles or something.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Country, New York, Thinking

  "Carl Hiaasen reports from 'Paradise': Con artists and land developers". Interview with Todd Leopold, www.cnn.com. November 9, 2001.

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• I've never progressed very far from my days as a smart aleck in middle school.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Smart, School, Middle

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• ...Right now there's a pair of bad cops on their way out here to shoot me." "You don't know that." "Yeah, you're right," Stranahan said. "They're probably just collecting Toys for Tots. Now go.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Way, Pairs, Toys

  Carl Hiaasen (2010). “Skin Tight”, p.214, Penguin

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• As frightening as this may sound, what you see in the books is the way I see the world. And so far I haven't seen anything, either in Florida or elsewhere, to dissuade me from it.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Book, Florida, Sound

  "Sunshine satirist" by Hadley Freeman, www.theguardian.com. October 23, 2004.

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• Mickey Cray had been out of work ever since a dead iguana fell from a palm tree and hit him on the head.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Iguanas, Tree, Mickey

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• Mrs. Bonneville never buckled her seat belt, even though it was required by state law; an ardent libertarian, she opposed government meddling in all matters of personal choice.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Law, Government, Choices

  Carl Hiaasen (2006). “Nature Girl”, Random House Large Print Publishing

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• I'd always wanted to write books ever since I was a kid.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Book, Writing, Kids

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• Disney is just Disney. It's a company that's very good at what it does - controlling and promoting an image - until something happens that it can't control or cover up.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Cover Ups, Doe, Very Good

  Source: www.omnivoracious.com

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• I won't be making any friends in the corporate suites.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Corporate

  "Carl Hiaasen reports from 'Paradise'" by Todd Leopold, www.cnn.com. November 9, 2001.

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• Bangkok 8 is one of the most startling and provocative mysteries that I've read in years. The characters are marvelously unique, the setting is intoxicating and the plot unwinds in dark illusory strands, reminiscent of Gorky Park. Once I started, I didn't want to put it down.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Character, Dark, Unique

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• I got overwhelmed by the magnitude of the celebrity culture in America. My background is as a news journalist, and newsrooms in the US are shrinking - investigation teams are being terminated or shrunk on newspapers all around the country. The one aspect that's expanded is coverage of celebrity culture.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Country, Team, America

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• You can do the best research and be making the strongest intellectual argument, but if readers don't get past the third paragraph you've wasted your energy and valuable ink.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Past, Intellectual, Energy

  "He's all the rage". Interview with Euan Ferguson, www.theguardian.com. March 17, 2002.

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• From my experience, politicians are much more uncomfortable being made fun of than they are being preached at and screeched at - you know, and the soapbox routine. They're much more uneasy knowing they're a target of ridicule.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Fun, Knowing, Routine

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• As a lobbyist he had long ago concluded there was no difference in how Democrats and Republicans conducted the business of government. The game stayed the same: It was always about favors and friends, and who controlled the dough. Party labels were merely a way to keep track of the teams; issues were mostly smoke and vaudeville. Nobody believed in anything except hanging on to power, whatever it took.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Team, Party, Government

  Carl Hiaasen (2001). “Sick Puppy”, p.94, Vintage Crime/Black Lizard

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• It's easy to get distracted by the vaudevillian aspects of the healthcare debate.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Healthcare, Debate, Easy

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• I've never before had the same main character appear in consecutive novels, but I liked Yancy and his attitude, and I was curious to see what would happen to him after Bad Monkey. And I liked the idea of him still trying to get his detective job back while he's stuck on roach patrol.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Jobs, Attitude, Character

  ""True-life Source Material Is Fabulously Bizarre" - Carl Hiaasen Answers Our Questions about "Razor Girl"". Interview with Adrian Liang, www.omnivoracious.com. September 08, 2016.

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• My driving record is not exemplary, but I have never had a speeding ticket over 100 m.p.h. I can say that unequivocally.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Records, Tickets, Driving

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• Nobody with an IQ higher than emergency-room temperature could ever believe that 'death panels' would be appointed to nudge the elderly toward euthanasia. Yet for idle entertainment, it's hard to beat Sarah Palin's ignorant nattering on the subject.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Believe, Elderly, Ignorant

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• Disney's something to be a little alarmed about. It's not just a little theme park anymore. It's now an ethic and outlook and strategy that goes way beyond central Florida.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Florida, Littles, Way

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• I’m waiting for the day when Rush Limbaugh’s pharmacist writes a book.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Book, Writing, Waiting

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• That's what people do when they find a special place that wild and full of life, they trample it to death.

  Carl Hiaasen

  People, Special, Special Places

  Carl Hiaasen (2014). “Carl Hiaasen Collection: Hoot, Flush, Scat, Chomp”, p.211, Knopf Books for Young Readers

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• Jimmy Lee Baylis was a wise man, and knew better than to talk back to the man who signed his paycheck.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Wise, Men, Paychecks

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• The one word that no politician will ever speak, is 'enough.' Enough.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Speak, Politician, Enough

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• The Thieves of Manhattan is a sly and cutting riff on the book-publishing world that is quite funny unless you happen to be an author, in which case the novel will make you consider a more sensible profession-like being a rodeo clown, for example, or a crab-fisherman in the Bering Sea.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Book, Cutting, Sea

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• Garcia wondered why people with JESUS stickers on their bumper always drove twenty miles per hour under the speed limit. If God was my co-pilot, he thought, I'd be doing a hundred and twenty.

  Carl Hiaasen

  Jesus, People, Twenties

  Carl Hiaasen (2010). “Strip Tease”, p.470, Vintage Crime/Black Lizard

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