~Sometimes, when I want to take on the world, I try to remember that it's just as important to sit down and ask my son how he's feeling or talk to him about life.~
The truth is I love being alive. And I love feeling free. So if I can't have those things then I feel like a caged animal and I'd rather not be in a cage. I'd rather be dead. And it's real simple. And I think it's not that uncommon.
To actually feel like you've done something good with your life and you're useful to others is what I was always wanting, and was always looking for.
I like the feeling of being dominated
... the one that has the worst effect for me was pot. I felt silly and giggly - I hate feeling like that.
The mind wants to forget because it weighs so much on the heart and soul. I am tired of crying and feeling so helpless. I want to breathe again -just for a little while.
My earliest memories are of my brother, pointing the home video camera at me and saying, "C'mon, Ange, give us a show!" Neither of my parents ever said, "Be quiet! Stop talking!" I remember my father looking me in the eye and asking, "What are you thinking? What are you feeling?" That's what I do in my job now - I say. "OK, how do I feel about this?" And I immediately know, because that's how I grew up.
The Coen brothers said something that helped me, "When you put the book down, you have a certain feeling, a certain understanding. That's what they need to feel when they walk out of the theater. That's your job, to literally put this book on film, you won't make a good movie, you'll do no service to anyone.
When I first went to places where people were suffering from war and persecution, I felt ashamed of my feelings of sadness. I could see more possibilities in my life.
I like the feeling of being dominated. It actually makes me feel safe as opposed to challenged.
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