I have never yet met anyone who did not think it was an agreeable sensation to cut tinfoil with scissors.
As the few adepts in such things well know, universal morality is to be found in little everyday penny-events just as much as in great ones. There is so much goodness and ingenuity in a raindrop that an apothecary wouldn't let it go for less than half-a-crown.
There is no greater impediment to progress in the sciences than the desire to see it take place too quickly.
Perhaps pure reason without heart would never have thought of God.
The ordinary man is ruined by the flesh lusting against the spirit; the scholar by the spirit lusting too much against the flesh.
Actual aristocracy cannot be abolished by any law: all the law can do is decree how it is to be imparted and who is to acquire it.
It is said that truth comes from the mouths of fools and children: I wish every good mind which feels an inclination for satire would reflect that the finest satirist always has something of both in him.
The "second sight" possessed by the Highlanders in Scotland is actually a foreknowledge of future events. I believe they possess this gift because they don't wear trousers.
How might letters be most efficiently copied so that the blind might read them with their fingers?
Affectation is a very good word when someone does not wish to confess to what he would none the less like to believe of himself.
One can live in this world on soothsaying but not on truth saying.
The drive to propagate our race has also propagated a lot of other things
Do we write books so that they shall merely be read? Don't we also write them for employment in the household? For one that is read from start to finish, thousands are leafed through, other thousands lie motionless, others are jammed against mouseholes, thrown at rats, others are stood on, sat on, drummed on, have gingerbread baked on them or are used to light pipes.
He who is in love with himself has at least this advantage - he won't encounter many rivals.
Many intelligent people, when about to write . . . , force on their minds a certain notion about style, just as they screw up their faces when they sit for their portraits.
The noble simplicity in the works of nature only too often originates in the noble shortsightedness of him who observes it.
If this is philosophy it is at any rate a philosophy that is not in its right mind.
One of our forefathers must have read a forbidden book.
A good metaphor is something even the police should keep an eye on.
The excuses we make to ourselves when we want to do something are excellent material for soliloquies, for they are rarely made except when we are alone, and are very often made aloud.
The girl who reveals herself heart and soul to her friend reveals the secrets of the entire sex; for every girl is the guardian of the feminine mysteries.
Human pride is a strange thing; it cannot easily be suppressed, and if you stop up hole A will peep forth again in a twinkling from another hole B, and if this is closed it is ready to come out at hole C, and so on.
He who says he hates every kind of flattery, and says it in earnest, certainly does not yet know every kind of flattery.
The highest point to which a weak but experienced mind can rise is detecting the weakness of better men.
We cannot remember too often that when we observe nature, and especially the ordering of nature, it is always ourselves alone we are observing.
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