Our minds want clothes as much as our bodies.
One of the first businesses of a sensible man is to know when he is beaten, and to leave off fighting at once.
Life is one long process of getting tired.
A friend who cannot at a pinch remember a thing or two that never happened is as bad as one who does not know how to forget.
Academic and aristocratic people live in such an uncommon atmosphere that common sense can rarely reach them.
Life is like music; it must be composed by ear, feeling, and instinct, not by rule.
Brigands demand your money or your life; women require both.
Christ: I dislike him very much. Still, I can stand him. What I cannot stand is the wretched band of people whose profession is to hoodwink us about him.
From a worldly point of view, there is no mistake so great as that of being always right.
If we attend continually and promptly to the little that we can do, we shall ere long be surprised to find how little remains that we cannot do.
Sensible people get the greater part of their own dying done during their own lifetime
The seven deadly sins: Want of money, bad health, bad temper, chastity, family ties, knowing that you know things, and believing in the Christian religion.
God and the Devil are an effort after specialisation and division of labour.
Friendship is like money, easier made than kept.
The best liar is he who makes the smallest amount of lying go the longest way.
What is faith but a kind of betting or speculation after all? It should be, I bet that my Redeemer liveth.
Life is not an exact science, it is an art.
Words are like money; there is nothing so useless, unless when in actual use.
Christ and The Church: If he were to apply for a divorce on the grounds of cruelty, adultery and desertion, he would probably get one.
Prayers are to men as dolls are to children.
It is tact that is golden, not silence.
Most people have never learned that one of the main aims in life is to enjoy it.
Theist and atheist: the fight between them is as to whether God shall be called God or shall have some other name.
Life is a quarry, out of which we are to mold and chisel and complete a character.
I do not mind lying, but I hate inaccuracy.
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