I saw Farrah Fawcett originally when she and her boyfriend, Lee Majors, came over to my house for a birthday party that I was having for my ex-wife, Leigh Taylor-Young.
When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
The years between fifty and seventy are the hardest. You are always being asked to do things, and yet you are not decrepit enough to turn them down.
There is still no cure for the common birthday.
The old believe everything, the middle-aged suspect everything, the young know everything.
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years.
You're only young once, but you can be immature forever.
Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself.
With mirth and laughter let old wrinkles come.
Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed.
As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two.
The night you gave me my birthday party... you were a young Lieutenant and I was a fragrant phantom, wasn't I? And it was a radiant night, a night of soft conspiracy and the trees agreed that it was all going to be for the best.
My second play, The Birthday Party, I wrote in 1958 - or 1957. It was totally destroyed by the critics of the day, who called it an absolute load of rubbish.
I've had this look for about a year. I usually grow this beard out around Christmas. I like to go to malls dressed as Jesus, and I like to then walk around the mall and go, 'No! No! This wasn't what it was supposed to be about, people!' Then if there's a Santa at the mall, I walk up to him and say, 'Listen, fat man, you're just a clown at my birthday party.'
I believe that at least 70 percent of parenting goes to the mother. In our house, I'm the one who knows about all the school stuff, helps with the homework, organizes the play dates, and remembers the birthday parties.
Magnus had often thought of getting a pet, but he had never considered acquiring a sullen teenage vampire. Once Raphael was gone, he thought, he was getting a cat. And he would always throw his cat a birthday party.
Birthday parties make me nervous as hell. They're one of those things where you're forced to be happy. And even if you're totally depressed, you're got to pretend you're glad you were born, regardless of the fact that getting older means you're closer to dying.
I learned to dance at quinceañeras - big [15th] birthday parties for Spanish girls. It was always funny to bring the white guy out [on the floor] and let him look like a fool.
Last night, I went to a birthday party, and this girl brought a cake and a cheesecake. And the other girls that lived in the apartment, I swear to God, all night long: 'You're taking that cake with you when you go. That cake's not staying in this house.' Like it's this evil, Hope Diamond, nuclear, horrifying cursed thing.
I changed schools a lot when I was in elementary school because some girls were mean. They were less mean in middle school, because I was doing all right; although this one girl gave me invitations to hand out to her birthday party that I wasn't invited to.
In Hollywood, there is another name for a woman's 40th birthday party, it's a retirement party.
Many massacres have happened when people yell "surprise"! Pearl Harbor. The Tet Offensive. My uncle's 50th birthday party. I was there, man! How many more people gotta die?
Four hundred thousand South Africans are dying of AIDS every year. This makes the war on Iraq look like a birthday party.
At my 30th birthday party, one of my best friends gave a toast and said I'd been waiting for that day since I was 13. Everyone laughed, but he was right! Life continues to get more fun, more surprising, more delightful.
I sometimes have birthday parties for the kids in my neighborhood and then pretend to suggest that I am going to molest them to the parents. It's a hilarious prank even though I am not a paedophile.
Follow AzQuotes on Facebook, Twitter and Google+. Every day we present the best quotes! Improve yourself, find your inspiration, share with friends
or simply: