Gail Carriger Quotes

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Cats Daughters Difficulty Dogs Doubt Eyes Fashion

It's no good choosing your first husband from a school for evil geniuses. Much too difficult to kill.

Gail Carriger

Husband, School, Evil

Gail Carriger (2013). “Etiquette and Espionage: Number 1 in series”, p.85, Hachette UK

41 Copy quote
I suspect it may be like the difference between a drinker and an alcoholic; the one merely reads books, the other needs books to make it through the day.

Gail Carriger

Book, Differences, Needs

20 Copy quote
I am rather fond of ladybugs. They are so delightfully hemispherical.

Gail Carriger

Ladybugs

26 Copy quote
How ghastly for her, people actually thinking, with their brains, and right next door. Oh, the travesty of it all.

Gail Carriger

Thinking, Doors, People

12 Copy quote
She took a moment to lament her lack of parasol. Every time she left the house, she felt keenly the absence of her heretofore ubiquitous accessory.

Gail Carriger

House, Accessories, Moments

Gail Carriger (2012). “Timeless: Book 5 of The Parasol Protectorate”, p.29, Hachette UK

8 Copy quote
Poetry can cause irreparable harm when misapplied

Gail Carriger

Irreparable Harm, Causes, Harm

Gail Carriger (2012). “Timeless: Book 5 of The Parasol Protectorate”, p.102, Hachette UK

2 Copy quote
[She] lost her patience, a thing she was all too prone to misplacing.

Gail Carriger

Lost

Gail Carriger (2011). “Heartless: Book 4 of The Parasol Protectorate”, p.27, Hachette UK

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One should do what one is best at on as large a scale as possible.

Gail Carriger

Should, Scales

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Scotsmen, she had occasion to observe, often did have nice knees. Perhaps that was why they insisted upon kilts.

Gail Carriger

Nice, Kilts, Knees

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She boasted the general battle-ax demeanor of an especially strict governess. This was the kind of woman who took her tea black, smoked cigars after midnight, played a mean game of cribbage, and kept a bevy of repulsive little dogs. Alexia liked her immediately.

Gail Carriger

Dog, Mean, Games

3 Copy quote
What if all those strange and unexplainable bends in history were the result of supernatural interference? At which point I asked myself, what's the weirdest most eccentric historical phenomenon of them all? Answer:the Great British Empire. Clearly, one tiny little island could only conquer half the known world with supernatural aid. Those absurd Victorian manners and ridiculous fashions were obviously dictated by vampires. And, without a doubt, the British army regimental system functions on werewolf pack dynamics.

Gail Carriger

Fashion, Army, Islands

4 Copy quote
Oh, Professor Lyall, are you making a funny? It doesn’t suit you.” The sandy-haired Beta gave Lady Maccon a dour look. “I am exploring new personality avenues.” “Well, stop it.” “Yes, my lady.

Gail Carriger

Suits You, Personality, Looks

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As with most things in life, Lady Maccon preferred the civilized exterior to the dark underbelly (with the exception of pork products, of course.)

Gail Carriger

Dark, Things In Life, Pork

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Lord Maccon, might we have words on the proper tying of a cravat? For my sanity’s sake? Lord Maccon was nonplussed. Professor Lyall, on the other hand, was pained. “I do what I can.” Lord Akeldama looked at him, pity in his eyes. “You are a brave man.

Gail Carriger

Eye, Men, Hands

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At such close range, even she could hit a vampire full force in the shoulder, surprising him considerably. He paused in his attack. “Well, my word! You can’t threaten me, you’re pregnant!

Gail Carriger

Vampire, Range, Force

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The door was locked and Alexia, resourceful as she was, had not yet learned to pick locks. Though she mentally added it to her list of useful skills she needed to acquire along with hand-to-hand combat and the recipe for pesto. If her life were to continue on its present track which after 26 years of obscurity, now seemed to mainly involve people trying to kill her, it would appear that acquiring a less savory skill set might be necessary. Although she supposed pesto making ought to be termed 'more savory'.

Gail Carriger

Doors, Hands, Years

5 Copy quote
Alexia had found pregnancy relatively manageable, up to a point. That point having been some three weeks ago, at which juncture her natural reserves of control gave way to sentimentality. Only yesterday she had ended breakfast sobbing over the fried eggs because they looked at her funny. The pack had spent a good half hour trying to find a way to pacify her. Her husband was so worried he looked to start crying himself.

Gail Carriger

Husband, Pregnancy, Eggs

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Felicity grimaced in agreement. “No, you are perfectly correct. I did not realize how vital the approbation of one’s butler is in allowing for nocturnal autonomy.

Gail Carriger

Agreement, Nocturnal, Realizing

Gail Carriger (2011). “Heartless: Book 4 of The Parasol Protectorate”, p.30, Hachette UK

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Captain Niall, having apparently resigned himself to losing his quarry, was savaging her horsehair petticoat into teeny, tiny shreds. "Really, what did my poor petticoat do to offend?

Gail Carriger

Captains, Tiny, Losing

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Lady Maccon stopped suddenly. Her husband got four long strides ahead before he realized she had paused. She was starring thoughtfully up into the aether, twirling the deadly parasol about her head. "I have just remembered something," Alexia said when he returned to her side. "Oh, that explains everything. How foolish of me to think you could walk and remember at the same time.

Gail Carriger

Husband, Thinking, Long

2 Copy quote
He dinna act like an Alpha." "He does in some areas.

Gail Carriger

Doe, Alphas, Areas

Gail Carriger (2012). “Timeless: Book 5 of The Parasol Protectorate”, p.190, Hachette UK

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I miss him, my lady.” “Well, he is now living adjacent. You can hardly miss him all that much.” “True. But we are no longer compatible—I am a werewolf; he is a vampire.” “So?” “So we cannot dance the same dance we used to.” Biffy was so sweet when he tried to be circumspect. Alexia shook her head at him. “Biffy, and I mean this in the kindest way possible: then you should change the music.” “Very good, my lady.

Gail Carriger

Sweet, Mean, Missing

Gail Carriger (2011). “Heartless: Book 4 of The Parasol Protectorate”, p.53, Hachette UK

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Miss Tarabotti was not one of life's milk-water misses--in fact, quite the opposite. Many a gentleman had likened his first meeting with her to downing a very strong cognac when one was expecting to imbibe fruit juice--that is to say, startling and apt to leave one with a distinct burning sensation.

Gail Carriger

Strong, Opposites, Fruit Juice

5 Copy quote
Highland werewolves had a reputation for doing atrocious and highly unwarranted *things*, like wearing smoking jackets to the dinner table.

Gail Carriger

Smoking, Tables, Dinner

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Tunstell, this is your Alpha speaking. Do as I tell you. You must regurgitate now. Regurgitation is an involuntary action. You cannot simply order me to do it,” replied Tunstell in a small voice. “I most certainly can. Besides which, you are an actor.” Tunstell grimaced. “I’ve never had cause to vomit onstage.

Gail Carriger

Order, Voice, Actors

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Born: May 4, 1976
Occupation: Archaeologist
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