One's need for loneliness is not satisfied if one sits at a table alone. There must be empty chairs as well.
A historian is not always a prophet facing backwards, but a journalist is always someone who afterwards knew everything beforehand.
I trim my opponents to fit my arrows.
Do not learn more than you absolutely need to get through life.
The streets of Vienna are paved with culture, the streets of other cities with asphalt.
I knew a man who carried his education in his vest pocket because there was more room there than in his head.
Journalist: a person without any ideas but with an ability to express them; a writer whose skill is improved by a deadline: the more time he has, the worse he writes.
Language is the mother of thought, not its handmaiden.
Where do I find the time for not reading so many books?
When I want to go to sleep, I must first get a whole menagerie of voices to shut up. You wouldn't believe what a racket they make in my room.
Sexuality poorly repressed unsettles some families; well repressed, it unsettles the whole world.
I master only the language of others. Mine does with me what it wants.
The difference between psychiatrists and other mentally disturbed people is something like the relationship between concave and convex madness.
Democracy divides people into workers and loafers. It makes no provision for those who have no time to work.
If something is stolen from you, don't go to the police. They're not interested. Don't go to a psychologist either, because he's interested in only one thing: that it was really you who did the stealing.
I have often been asked to be fair and view a matter from all sides. I did so, hoping that something might improve if I viewed allsides of it. But the result was the same. So I went back to viewing things only from one side, which saves me a lot of work and disappointment. For it is comforting to regard something as bad and to be able to use one's prejudice as an excuse.
When a culture feels that its end has come, it sends for a priest.
A philistine is habitually bored and looks for things that won't bore him. An artist finds things boring, but is never bored.
Stupidity gets up early; that is why events are accustomed to happening in the morning.
A woman occasionally is quite a serviceable substitute for masturbation.
Language is the only chimera whose illusory power is endless, the inexhaustibility which keeps life from being impoverished. Let men learn to serve language.
Humanity and bestiality: when will the former finally be uttered with the flavor of hate and the latter with the flavor of love? Does a lion tear his fellow lion to pieces?
Since the law prohibits the keeping of wild animals and I get no enjoyment from pets, I prefer to remain unmarried.
Many desire to kill me, and many wish to spend an hour chatting with me. The law protects me from the former.
My unconscious knows more about the consciousness of the psychologist than his consciousness knows about my unconscious.
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