Farmers only worry during the growing season, but townspeople worry all the time.
Nearly every lawsuit is an insult to the intelligence of both plaintiff and defendant.
Indignation does no good unless it is backed with a club of sufficient size to awe the opposition.
We are not free, it was not intended we should be. A book of rules is placed in our cradle, and we never get rid of it until we reach our graves. Then we are free, and only then.
The most agreeable thing in life is worthy accomplishment. It is not possible that the idle tramp is as contented as the farmers along the road who own their own farms, and whose credit is good at the bank in town. When the tramps get together at night, they abuse the farmers, but do not get as much satisfaction out of it as do the farmers who abuse the tramps. The sounder your argument, the more satisfaction you get out of it.
You can't do anything unless you do it yourself. And usually you can't do it yourself very well.
A poem is no place for an idea.
The sounder your argument, the more satisfaction you get out of it.
About all some men accomplish in life is to send a son to Harvard.
The underdog often starts the fight, and occasionally the upper dog deserves to win.
Most people have seen worse things in private than they pretend to be shocked at in public.
It is your enemies who keep you straight. For real use one active, sneering enemy is worth two ordinary friends.
No scheme pays as well as legitimate business.
A women could never be President. A condidate must be over 35, and where are you going to find a woman who will admit she's over 35?
A loafer never works except when there is a fire; then he will carry out more furniture than anybody.
Men are virtuous because women are; women are virtuous from necessity.
Most of us are either too think to enjoy eating, or too fat to enjoy walking.
What is common sense? That which attracts the least opposition that which brings most agreeable and worthy results.
When you can't do anything else to a boy, you can make him wash his face.
Express a mean opinion of yourself occasionally; it will show your friends that you know how to tell the truth.
When I get hold of a book I particularly admire, I am so enthusiastic that I loan it to someone who never brings it back.
Honesty is largely a matter of information, of knowing that dishonesty is a mistake. Principle is not as powerful in keeping people straight as a policeman.
If you have sense enough to realize why flies gather around a restaurant, you should be able to appreciate why men run for office.
Success does not mean happiness: it means an unusual number of industrious enemies.
I believe in grumbling; it is the politest form of fighting known.
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