Love demands infinitely less than friendship.
Bad officials are the ones elected by good citizens who do not vote.
A man reserves his true and deepest love not for the species of woman in whose company he finds himself electrified and enkindled, but for that one in whose company he may feel tenderly drowsy.
It is also said of me that I now and then contradict myself. Yes, I improve wonderfully as time goes on.
The notion that as a man grows older his illusions leave him is not quite true. What is true is that his early illusions are supplanted by new, and to him, equally convincing illusions.
Criticism is the art of appraising others at one's own value.
An optimist is a fellow who believes a housefly is looking for a way to get out.
All that is necessary to raise imbecility into what the mob regards as profundity is to lift it off the floor and put it on a platform.
No man can think clearly when his fists are clenched.
I drink to make other people interesting.
The path of sound credence is through the thick forest of skepticism.
Patriotism is often an arbitrary veneration of real estate above principles.
Love is an emotion experienced by the many and enjoyed by the few.
Whenever a man encounters a woman in a mood he doesn't understand, he wants to know if she's tired.
In the theatre, a hero is one who believes that all women are ladies, a villain one who believes that all ladies are women.
It is the mark of a superior person that, left to themselves they are able endlessly to amuse, interest and entertain themselves out of their personal stock of meditations, ideas, criticisms, memories, philosophy, humor and what not.
Beauty makes idiots sad and wise men merry.
Love is the emotion that a woman feels always for a poodle dog and sometimes for a man.
Politics is the diversion of trivial men who, when they succeed at it, become important in the eyes of more trivial men.
A ham is simply any actor who has not been successful in repressing his natural instincts.
To speak of morals in art is to speak of legislature in sex. Art is the sex of the imagination.
Common sense, in so far as it exists, is all for the bourgeoisie. Nonsense is the privilege of the aristocracy. The worries of the world are for the common people.
I know many married men, I even know a few happily married men, but I don't know one who wouldn't fall down the first open coal hole running after the first pretty girl who gave him a wink.
Criticism is the windows and chandeliers of art: it illuminates the enveloping darkness in which art might otherwise rest only vaguely discernible, and perhaps altogether unseen.
I have yet to find a man worth his salt in any direction who did not think of himself first and foremost.
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