Alexander Woollcott Quotes

• There is no such thing in anyone's life as an unimportant day.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Life, Motivational, Encouragement

  Alexander Woollcott (1951). “The Indispensable Woollcott”

  48 Copy quote

• The two oldest professions in the world — ruined by amateurs.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Two, World, Moral

  Shouts and Murmurs "The Actor and the Streetwalker" (1922)

  24 Copy quote

• All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Funny, Food, Illegal Things

  Quoted in Readers Digest, Dec. 1933

  82 Copy quote

• I'm tired of hearing it said that democracy doesn't work. Of course it doesn't work. We are supposed to work it.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Tired, Government, Democracy

  15 Copy quote

• To all things clergic I am allergic.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Religion, Allergic, All Things

  10 Copy quote

• A hick town is one where there is no place to go where you shouldn't go.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Funny, Humor, Places To Go

  12 Copy quote

• Many of us spend half of our time wishing for things we could have if we didn't spend half our time wishing.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Funny, Time, Insperational

  14 Copy quote

• Nothing risque, nothing gained.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Sex, Risque

  9 Copy quote

• His huff arrived and he departed in it.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Departed, Luck

  10 Copy quote

• At 83, George Bernard Shaw's mind was perhaps not quite as good as it used to be, but it was still better than anyone else's.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Mind, Bernard Shaw, Used

  "While Rome Burns". Book by Alexander Woollcott, 1934.

  13 Copy quote

• The scenery in the play was beautiful, but the actors got in front of it.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Beautiful, Art, Play

  10 Copy quote

• One listens to one's lawyer prattle on as long as one can stand it and then signs where indicated.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Law, Long, Modern Life

  11 Copy quote

• The English have an extraordinary ability for flying into a great calm.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Flying, Insulting, England

  Address in Reply to His Majesty's Most Gracious Speech, hansard.millbanksystems.com. November 01, 1950.

  9 Copy quote

• All the things I really like to do are either illegal, immoral, or fattening.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Illegal Things, Illegal, Fattening

  "The Knock at the Stage Door". Reader's Digest, December 1933.

  20 Copy quote

• Reading Proust is like bathing in someone else's dirty water.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Art, Dirty, Reading

  7 Copy quote

• There's absolutely nothing wrong with Oscar Levant that a miracle can't fix.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Personality, Miracle, Oscars

  2 Copy quote

• Today just might be the best day to start seriously thinking about quitting smoking.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Encouragement, Thinking, Smoking

  5 Copy quote

• You haven't lived until you died in New York.

  Alexander Woollcott

  New York, Havens, Died

  3 Copy quote

• Los Angeles is seven suburbs in search of a city.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Cities, Los Angeles, Seven

  4 Copy quote

• I count it a high honor to belong to a profession in which the good men write every paragraph, every sentence, every line, as lovingly as any Addison or Steele, and do so in full regard that by tomorrow it will have been burned, or used, if at all, to line a shelf.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Writing, Men, Good Man

  2 Copy quote

• It comes from the likes of you! Take what you can get! Grab the chances as they come along! Act in hallways! Sing in doorways! Dance in cellars!

  Alexander Woollcott

  Doorways, Likes, Chance

  39 Copy quote

• She was like a sinking ship firing on the rescuers.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Sarcastic, Ships, Sinking

  Alexander Woollcott (1951). “The Indispensable Woollcott”

  4 Copy quote

• A broker is a man who runs your fortune into a shoestring.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Running, Men, Fortune

  4 Copy quote

• Once in pre-war days, when curiously-bonneted women drivers were familiar sights at the taxi-wheels, I cried out to one in my dismay: "Is there no speed limit in this mad city?"
  "Oh, yes, monsieur," she answered sweetly over her shoulder, "but no one has ever succeeded in reaching it."

  Alexander Woollcott

  War, Sight, Cities

  "The Paris Taxi-Driver Considered as an Artist". "Enchanted Aisles". Book by Alexander Woollcott, 1924.

  1 Copy quote

• Mrs. Patrick Cambell is an aged British battleship sinking rapidly and firing every available gun on her rescuers.

  Alexander Woollcott

  Art, Gun, Entertainment

  5 Copy quote

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