Dorothy Parker Quotes

Quotes about:

• If you don't have anything nice to say, come sit by me.

  Dorothy Parker

  Nice, Magnolias, Social Graces

  117 Copy quote
• 

  Of course I talk to myself. I like a good speaker, and I appreciate an intelligent audience.

  Dorothy Parker

  Intelligent, Appreciate, Audience

  "Biography / Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  216 Copy quote

• Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.

  Dorothy Parker

  Birthday, Age, May

  163 Copy quote

• If you want to know what God thinks about money, just look at the people He gives it to.

  Dorothy Parker

  Funny, Inspiring, God

  153 Copy quote

• I like to have a martini/Two at the very most/After three I'm under the table/After four I'm under my host.

  Dorothy Parker

  Drinking, Two, Alcohol

  "Biography / Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  180 Copy quote

• The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.

  Dorothy Parker

  Funny, Life, Wisdom

  113 Copy quote
• 

  Creativity is a wild mind and a disciplined eye.

  Dorothy Parker

  Creativity, Eye, Mind

  179 Copy quote

• Never throw mud: you can miss the target, but your hands will remain dirty.

  Dorothy Parker

  Dirty, Hands, Missing

  150 Copy quote

• If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second-greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style. The first-greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they're happy.

  Dorothy Parker

  Friendship, Happy, Writing

  157 Copy quote

• If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

  Dorothy Parker

  Funny, Anniversary, Valentines Day

  98 Copy quote

• The first thing I do in the morning is brush my teeth and sharpen my tongue.

  Dorothy Parker

  Morning, Tongue, Firsts

  "Biography / Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  200 Copy quote
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  The only dependable law of life - everything is always worse than you thought it was going to be.

  Dorothy Parker

  Law, Laws Of Life, Dependable

  Dorothy Parker (2002). “Complete Stories”, p.200, Penguin

  186 Copy quote

• You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think.

  Dorothy Parker

  Funny, Women, Thinking

  On being challenged to use "horticulture" in a sentence, in John Keats You Might as well Live (1970) p. 46

  100 Copy quote

• Years are only garments, and you either wear them with style all your life, or else you go dowdy to the grave.

  Dorothy Parker

  Years, Style, Garments

  143 Copy quote

• It was written without fear and without research.

  Dorothy Parker

  Art, Research, Entertainment

  Dorothy Parker, Stuart Y. Silverstein (2009). “Not Much Fun: The Lost Poems of Dorothy Parker”, p.41, Simon and Schuster

  18 Copy quote

• You can't teach an old dogma new tricks.

  Dorothy Parker

  Dogma, Tricks, Wit

  Attributed to Dorothy Parker after her death in Robert E. Drennan "The Algonquin Wits" (p. 124), 1968.

  115 Copy quote

• He is a writer for the ages, the ages of four to eight.

  Dorothy Parker

  Funny, Eight, Age

  8 Copy quote

• Don't look at me in that tone of voice.

  Dorothy Parker

  Humorous, Voice, Looks

  39 Copy quote

• If all the young ladies who attended the Yale promenade dance were laid end to end, no one would be the least surprised.

  Dorothy Parker

  Sex, Yale, Would Be

  58 Copy quote

• Honesty means nothing until you are tested under circumstances where you are sure you could get away with dishonesty.

  Dorothy Parker

  Honesty, Mean, Where You Are

  30 Copy quote

• When I was young and bold and strong, The right was right, the wrong was wrong. With plume on high and flag unfurled, I rode away to right the world. But now I’m old - and good and bad, Are woven in a crazy plaid. I sit and say the world is so, And wise is s/he who lets it go.

  Dorothy Parker

  Wise, Strong, Crazy

  22 Copy quote

• Four be the things I am wiser to know:
  Idleness, sorrow, a friend, and a foe.
  Four be the things I'd been better without:
  Love, curiosity, freckles, and doubt.
  Three be the things I shall never attain:
  Envy, content, and sufficient champagne.
  Three be the things I shall have till I die:
  Laughter and hope and a sock in the eye.

  Dorothy Parker

  Hope, Laughter, Eye

  Dorothy Parker (1992). “The Sayings of Dorothy Parker”, Duckbacks

  99 Copy quote

• A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

  Dorothy Parker

  Hangover, Wrath, Grapes

  86 Copy quote

• Heterosexuality is not normal, it's just common.

  Dorothy Parker

  Heterosexuality Is, Diversity, Normal

  28 Copy quote

• If you looked for things to make you feel hurt and wretched and unnecessary, you were certain to find them.

  Dorothy Parker

  Hurt, Attitude, Unnecessary

  Dorothy Parker (2002). “Complete Stories”, p.264, Penguin

  60 Copy quote

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