Ogden Nash Quotes

Quotes about:

• Whenever you're wrong, admit it; Whenever you're right, shut up.

  Ogden Nash

  Inspirational, Life, Marriage

  Ogden Nash, “A Word To Husbands”

  65 Copy quote

• Humor is the best means of surviving in a difficult world.

  Ogden Nash

  Mean, Survival, World

  6 Copy quote

• The door of a bigoted mind opens outwards so that the only result of the pressure of facts upon it is to close it more snugly.

  Ogden Nash

  Doors, Mind, Pressure

  Ogden Nash (1942). “Good intentions”, Little, Brown

  79 Copy quote
• 

  Middle-age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you.

  Ogden Nash

  Funny, Birthday, Friday

  95 Copy quote

• Some tortures are physical And some are mental, But the one that is both Is dental.

  Ogden Nash

  Funny, Dental Work, Teeth

  Ogden Nash (1941). “The face is familiar: the selected verse of Ogden Nash”, Garden City publishing company, inc

  138 Copy quote

• God in His wisdom made the fly And then forgot to tell us why.

  Ogden Nash

  God, Wisdom, Silly

  1942 Good Intentions,'The Fly'.

  12 Copy quote

• Among other things I think humor is a shield, a weapon, a survival kit. So here we are several billion of us, crowded into our global concentration camp for the duration. How are we to survive? Solemnity is not the answer, any more than witless and irresponsible frivolity is. I think our best chance lies in humor, which in this case means a wry acceptance of our predicament. We don't have to like it but we can at least recognize its ridiculous aspects, one of which is ourselves.

  Ogden Nash

  Lying, Mean, Acceptance

  "A Gleeful Splash of Ogden Nash" by Jonathan Yardley, www.washingtonpost.com. May 08, 2005.

  16 Copy quote

• One thing about the past. It's likely to last.

  Ogden Nash

  Past, Lasts, One Thing

  12 Copy quote

• I am a conscientious man, when I throw rocks at seabirds I leave no tern unstoned.

  Ogden Nash

  Funny, Humor, Men

  "Biography/Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  28 Copy quote

• Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them.

  Ogden Nash

  Relationship, Marriage, Funny Birthday

  "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com.

  52 Copy quote

• Wind is caused by the trees waving their branches.

  Ogden Nash

  Wind, Tree, Branches

  10 Copy quote

• Here's a good rule of thumb; too clever is dumb.

  Ogden Nash

  Sports, Clever, Psychology

  Ogden Nash (1941). “The face is familiar: the selected verse of Ogden Nash”, Garden City publishing company, inc

  7 Copy quote

• Some primal termite knocked on wood.
  And tasted it, and found it good.
  And that is why your Cousin May
  Fell through the parlor floor today.

  Ogden Nash

  Cousin, Science, May

  Ogden Nash (1945). “The Selected Verse of Ogden Nash”, New York : Modern Library

  8 Copy quote

• If you don't want to work, you have to work to earn enough money so that you won't have to work.

  Ogden Nash

  Funny, Money, Crazy

  Ogden Nash (1945). “The Selected Verse of Ogden Nash”, New York : Modern Library

  48 Copy quote

• Happiness is having a scratch for every itch.

  Ogden Nash

  Funny, Happiness, Happy

  76 Copy quote

• No, you never get any fun
  Out of the things you haven't done.

  Ogden Nash

  Children, Fun, Done

  Ogden Nash (1945). “The Selected Verse of Ogden Nash”, New York : Modern Library

  20 Copy quote

• How confusing the beams from memory's lamp are; One day a bachelor, the next a grampa. What is the secret of the trick? How did I get so old so quick?

  Ogden Nash

  Memories, Confusing, Secret

  4 Copy quote

• I believe that people believe what they believe they believe.

  Ogden Nash

  Believe, People, I Believe

  Ogden Nash (1942). “Good intentions”, Little, Brown

  17 Copy quote

• Too much Chablis can make you whablis.

  Ogden Nash

  Wine, Too Much

  22 Copy quote

• If called by a panther, don't anther.

  Ogden Nash

  Advice, Panthers, Ifs

  Ogden Nash (1941). “The Face is Familiar: The Selected Verse of Ogden Nash”, Garden City, N. Y : Garden City publishing Company, Incorporated

  5 Copy quote

• The truth I do not stretch or shove
  When I state the dog is full of love.
  I've also proved, by actual test,
  A wet dog is the lovingest.

  Ogden Nash

  Dog, Tests, States

  Ogden Nash, Étienne Delessert (1987). “Ogden Nash's zoo”, Stewart, Tabori and Chang

  21 Copy quote

• All husbands are alike, but they have different faces so you can tell them apart.

  Ogden Nash

  Wedding, Husband, Different Faces

  6 Copy quote

• The cow is of the bovine ilk: One end is moo, the other, milk.

  Ogden Nash

  Animal, Bovine, Cows

  'The Cow' (1931)

  9 Copy quote

• There has been a lot of progress during my lifetime, but I'm afraid it's heading in the wrong direction.

  Ogden Nash

  Progress, Lifetime, Headings

  30 Copy quote

• The camel has a single hump, The dromedary, two; Or else the other way around; I'm never sure. Are you?

  Ogden Nash

  Two, Camels, Way

  'The Camel' (1936)

  10 Copy quote

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