You shouldn't punish others for your own choices.
Expert: a man who makes three correct guesses consecutively.
Humility is the embarrassment you feel when you tell people how wonderful you are.
Everyone is in awe of the lion tamer in a cage with half a dozen lions-everyone but a school bus driver.
The machinery of government is a vast series of interlocking hierarchies riddled through and through with incompetence.
Fools rush in where wise men fear to trade.
Work is accomplished by those employees who have not yet reached their level of incompetence.
Many an optimist has become rich simply by buying out a pessimist.
Would the boy you were be proud of the man you are?
There is no stigma attached to recognizing a bad decision in time to install a better one.
It usually takes two people to make one of them angry.
We hate to have some people give us advice because we know how badly they need it themselves.
A free press is one that prints a dictator's speech but doesn't have to.
If the outcome is good, what's the difference between motives that sound good and good, sound motives?
Incompetence plus incompetence equals incompetence.
When I want your opinion I'll give it to you.
The best intelligence test is what we do with our leisure.
You can always tell a real friend: when you've made a fool of yourself he doesn't feel you've done a permanent job.
Middle age is when you stop criticizing the older generation and start criticizing the younger one.
There are more pretty photographs of women than there are photographs of pretty women.
It's better to have loved and lost than to have to do forty pounds of laundry a week.
An optimist expects his dreams to come true; a pessimist expects his nightmares to.
We are members of a strange species that devotes its energies to climbing the ladder of success in order to make money to buy things we don't like.
The devil could change. He was once an angel and may be evolving still.
Bureaucracy defends the status quo long past the time when the quo has lost its status.
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