Colin Quinn Quotes

Quotes about:

• You can’t make everybody laugh. You gotta just do what you think is funny. Just be obstreperous to everybody.

  Colin Quinn

  Funny, Thinking, Laughing

  "Colin Quinn On Brad Pitt, Herman Cain, Comedy And Twitter". Interview with Jordan Zakarin, www.huffingtonpost.com. December 5, 2011.

  49 Copy quote

• It’s sad. Marxism didn’t work. Communism didn’t work. Capitalism doesn’t work. Nothing works. Even democracy doesn’t work. Democracy-the greatest form of government and we have two choices for who’s our leader. In fascism you only have one choice. That’s great. We have one more choice than the worst form of government.

  Colin Quinn

  Sad, Leadership, Work

  44 Copy quote

• I know nowadays the common wisdom is to celebrate diversity as long as you don't point out that people are different.

  Colin Quinn

  Long, People, Diversity

  27 Copy quote

• I'm just another guy who thinks he's smarter than he is, in a long line of them.

  Colin Quinn

  Thinking, Long, Guy

  15 Copy quote

• The earth is a used Kleenex on the universe's nightstand.

  Colin Quinn

  Earth, Used, Kleenex

  10 Copy quote

• Humanity is a crazy contradiction. I accept us for who we are. We're not that great. Every time we take a step forward we go back to the same primitive behavior. We're meant to be this way. It's not our fault, it's just who we are.

  Colin Quinn

  Crazy, Humanity, Who We Are

  12 Copy quote

• Twitter is one of those dangerous toys that if it gets in the hands of the wrong person you'll have the mind of a 12-year-old masquerading as an adult.

  Colin Quinn

  Hands, Years, Mind

  10 Copy quote

• The ancient Greeks were the first ones to say an unexamined life is not worth living. They don't tell you of course what we found out, an examined life not that fascinating either.

  Colin Quinn

  Greek, Firsts, Life Is

  15 Copy quote

• You know how it is with writing. You just write what you want to write. There's no way to predict what is good or bad. You just do what you think is funny, and either it works or you're finished. It's impossible to predict anything.

  Colin Quinn

  Funny, Writing, Thinking

  Interview with Nathan Rabin, www.avclub.com. June 18, 2003.

  10 Copy quote

• I used to love the election season'cause it's kind of fun. Everyone makes a big sport out of it with all these different news stories and everything. I like it better now that everybody knows all the candidates from the past 15 years. But it does get really ugly. It's ugly and it's pugilist.

  Colin Quinn

  Sports, Fun, Past

  Source: www.esquire.com

  7 Copy quote

• So instead of talking about theoretical ways of ending the war and violence, I say that we have to get rid of the individual asholes in each office and situation.

  Colin Quinn

  War, Talking, Office

  "Colin Quinn...Irish Comic Standing". Interview with AskMen, www.askmen.com.

  10 Copy quote

• The Senate was holding hearings on deceptive sweepstakes practices. These companies target the elderly, making them think they're going to get a bunch of money, when in reality they never see any of it. The most popular of these scams is called Social Security.

  Colin Quinn

  Thinking, Reality, Elderly

  7 Copy quote

• I think everyone should own six guns, even though I don't own any.

  Colin Quinn

  Gun, Thinking, Six

  Interview with Christopher Kompanek, www.avclub.com. August 31, 2010.

  8 Copy quote

• The mistake that people make in stand-up is thinking they're profound or they're deep when there are so many people who have more worthwhile ways of phrasing things.

  Colin Quinn

  Mistake, Thinking, People

  Interview with Nathan Rabin, www.avclub.com. June 18, 2003.

  7 Copy quote

• People say history is boring, and that is true because people are boring. We haven't changed since time began. We're still the same.

  Colin Quinn

  Change, People, Boring

  "Biography / Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  10 Copy quote

• People say history was written by the winners. No, it wasn't. It was written by the bullies.

  Colin Quinn

  People, Bully, Winner

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

  6 Copy quote

• I think if you try to tailor your act to anybody, you end up with an act that doesn't work anyway.

  Colin Quinn

  Thinking, Trying, Tailors

  "Colin Quinn On Brad Pitt, Herman Cain, Comedy And Twitter". Interview with Jordan Zakarin, www.huffingtonpost.com. May 12, 2011.

  4 Copy quote

• With comedians, you have that understanding that we're trying to get laughs.

  Colin Quinn

  Laughing, Understanding, Comedian

  Interview with Christopher Kompanek, www.avclub.com. August 31, 2010.

  4 Copy quote

• My stand-up act? I combine the fact that the world is a violent place with the fact that each person is responsible for the situation they are in.

  Colin Quinn

  World, Facts, Violent

  "Interview: Colin Quinn picture". www.askmen.com.

  7 Copy quote

• You can't make money on Broadway. You make nothing. You maybe make like $1,350 a week after you pay out all the producers.

  Colin Quinn

  Broadway, Pay, Making Money

  8 Copy quote

• The thing that drives me crazy is when comics say 'I have low self-esteem.' No you don't. You're standing on stage asking people to pay. You don't play an instrument. You want people to pay to hear what's in your mind. You don't have low self-esteem. You might have other problems.

  Colin Quinn

  Crazy, Self Esteem, Play

  7 Copy quote

• I would say most comedians have a very cynical worldview of the way the world can work. It's almost like if you didn't, you couldn't be a comedian.

  Colin Quinn

  Cynical, Comedian, World

  8 Copy quote

• I get the impression the English kings were witty, for some reason. I feel like all you had was your wit.

  Colin Quinn

  Witty, Kings, Reason

  9 Copy quote

• I think Helen of Troy must have been pretty hot. She got two countries going crazy for 10 years over her.

  Colin Quinn

  Country, Crazy, Thinking

  52 Copy quote

• A weird sort of awareness set in, like, 'Wow. My stand-up isn't just separate from everything else I do anymore.' With Twitter and Face book, everything is universal that everything everybody says gets seen.

  Colin Quinn

  Book, Comedian, Wow

  4 Copy quote

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