I think we obviously need health care. Of course we need health care, but I think that it's gone too far the other way, and I don't understand it. It's gotten so complicated. The minute they made a deal with the drug companies, you know something isn't kosher here.
When you're first-generation money, you want to say, "I got a Mercedes and a Rolls and a Lamborghini. Take a look." When you're second-generation money, you're very quiet behind your country club doors. I think that's why people are much more aware. It's the first-generation wives that have the huge rings and the second-generation says, "Everyone be quiet as we get on our yacht or our private plane."
Obama came in and said he was going turn everything around, and you can't. Give the guy a break. But I question a lot of what's happening. It's certainly going to reflect in my vote, but who else is there? It's a horrible time, because people vote party lines instead of what's good for the country. I think the whole health care issue turned so ugly, because of party lines, and that's not what that's supposed to be about.
I'm at the top, top, top of my game now. I'm so happy to be on that stage, I'm in control of it, and I love every minute of it. I walk onstage in rehearsal and I start to smile. And so I just don't care what anyone else is doing. Do what you want, say what you want. Nobody else can do what I do onstage. Nobody.
I think we all in comedi business, especially when we reach a certain age, are divas up to a point. I love when a limousine comes for me, I can't lie about that. I love when you go to a restaurant and they say, "Come this way, Miss Rivers," and you get a good table. I love all that, the perks that come with the business.
Life is very tough, you know. You sit at a dinner party and talk to the person on your right or your left, you're going to hear something terribly sad, or horrible, or awful. And you just laugh at everything. I think it was Winston Churchill who said something like, any time you get someone to laugh, you're giving them a little vacation. It's so true. You laugh for one second, you're happy. I find in negotiations, everybody's sitting around looking so serious, I say something funny and it breaks the ice. And it's like, now we can get through this.
If you hate something, you hate it, and if you like something or somebody, you like it, but tell the truth. And most celebrities have that thin veneer that they will not break for you.
The glass is always half empty. All good comedians are manic-depressive.
I love the way my life has fallen into place.
Life is hard. And we better laugh at everything, otherwise we're going down the tube.
Every time I get on an airplane I figure it's gonna get blown up. You live on the edge.
Comedy is a very rough beat. It's no holds barred, as it should be.
Girls just want to have fun. Well, so do old ladies!
Everyone takes fashion so seriously! It's fashion - enjoy it!
What could be nicer than to have three horrible children behind you in an airplane, and the next set, you go onstage and you talk about how much you despise the children and what you would like to do to them on an airplane? That's the only time I would gladly take a terrorist on. It'd be worth it to get rid of these children.
I think anyone who's perfectly happy isn't particularly funny. And when you're very, very happy, you're not very funny. You're just happy. I'd rather be damaged and funny.
Comedy exists to laugh at things that aren't laughable. But isn't it? That's what separates us from the animals. We laugh.
Gay marriage, I am so against it because if all my gay friends get married, it will cost me a fortune in gifts.
If two people want to get married, get married! The Victorians had a great saying: As long as it doesn't scare the horses, do what you want. And I absolutely believe that.
If you don't think you're funny, no one else will.
I like my politicians and my judges and my lawyers to be simple. I think if you worry about where your hemline is you're really not concentrating on the world crisis.
I think Hillary Clinton's style is perfect. Perfect. You don't notice what she's wearing, you notice the woman.
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