Daniel Handler Quotes - Page 7

Quotes about:

• I think I’ve always believed that there is one person in the universe who you’re truly meant for–for whom you are truly meant–and the fact that sometimes there are two or even more people on the earth you can fall in love with really bothers me. It suggests that if you work hard you can be meant for anyone.

  Daniel Handler

  Falling In Love, Hard Work, Thinking

  7 Copy quote

• Why haven't we fixed sick yet? You scientists there-- put down those starfish and HELP us. I hereby demand that all the people who are good at math make the world free of illness. The rest of us will write you epic poems and staple them together into a booklet.

  Daniel Handler

  Writing, Math, Epic

  8 Copy quote

• Who are you?" Violet asked. It is confusing to fall asleep in the daytime and wake up at night. "what are you doing with Uncle Monty's reptiles?" Klaus asked. It is also confusing to realize you have been sleeping on stairs, rather than in a bed or sleeping bag. "Dixnik?" Sunny asked. It is always confusing why anyone would choose to wear a plaid shirt.

  Daniel Handler

  Uncles, Fall, Sleep

  8 Copy quote

• Never mind what my name is,” the man said. “No one can pronounce it anyway. Just call me Sir.

  Daniel Handler

  Men, Names, Mind

  4 Copy quote

• There is nothing particularly wrong with salmon, of course, but like caramel candy, strawberry yogurt, or liquid carpet cleaner, if you eat too much of it you are not going to enjoy your meal.

  Daniel Handler

  Salmon, Meals, Yogurt

  10 Copy quote

• Desperation is like a spilled drink; even if it's delicious, no one will get near it. Cultivate an aura of glamorous unapproachability.

  Daniel Handler

  Auras, Desperation, Drink

  4 Copy quote

• It's different," you said. "You've made, Min, everything different for me. Everything's like coffee you made me try, better than I ever - or the places I didn't even know were right on the street, you know? I'm like this thing I saw when I was little, where a kid hears a noise under his bed and there's a ladder there that's never been there before, and he climbs down and, it's for kids I know, but this song starts playing..." Your eyes were traveling in the treey light.

  Daniel Handler

  Song, Coffee, Kids

  "Why We Broke Up". Book by Daniel Handler, December, 2011.

  4 Copy quote

• To stutter through it with you or even stop stuttering and say nothing, was so lucky and soft, better talk than mile-a-minute with anyone. After a few minutes we’d stop rattling, we’d adjust, we’d settle in, and the conversation would speed into the night.

  Daniel Handler

  Night, Lucky, Speed

  8 Copy quote

• Everything. A letter may be coded, and a word may be coded. A theatrical performance may be coded, and a sonnet may be coded, and there are times when it seems the entire world is in code. Some believe that the world can be decoded by performing research in a library. Others believe that the world can be decoded by reading a newspaper. In my case, the only thing that made sense of the world was you, and without you the world will seem as garbled and tragic as a malfunctioning typewrit9.

  Daniel Handler

  Reading, Believe, Library

  4 Copy quote

• I will love you if I never see you again, and I will love you if I see you every Tuesday.

  Daniel Handler

  Love You, Tuesday, You Again

  4 Copy quote

• You'd think that sweet would be a land far, far away from irritating, but as it turns out they're right next door, and always having border disputes.

  Daniel Handler

  Sweet, Thinking, Doors

  4 Copy quote

• Everyone on earth would never starve and forever find love and happiness, since we won, but if we’d lost, they would have gouged out our eyes and thrown us naked onto hot coals and poisonous snakes for all the cheering and hugging at the end, strangers hugging like the end of The Omega Virus when Steve Sturmine finds the antidote.

  Daniel Handler

  Cheer, Eye, Snakes

  Daniel Handler (2012). “Why We Broke Up”, p.68, Egmont UK

  4 Copy quote

• Someone feeling wronged is like someone feeling thirsty. Don’t tell them they aren’t. Sit with them and have a drink.

  Daniel Handler

  Feelings, Drink, Thirsty

  "Dreaming in Public: Building the Occupy Movement". Book by Amy Schrager Lang and Daniel Lang/Levitsky, p. 199, 2012.

  19 Copy quote

• Everybody will die, but very few people want to be reminded of that fact.

  Daniel Handler

  People, Want, Facts

  5 Copy quote

• The story of the Baudelaires takes place in a very real world, where some people are laughed at just because they have something wrong with them, and where children can find themselves all alone in the world, struggling to understand the mystery that surrounds them.

  Daniel Handler

  Children, Real, Struggle

  "The Carnivorous Carnival". Book by Daniel Handler, 2002.

  4 Copy quote

• Count Olaf certainly does sound evil. Imagine forcing children to stand near a stove!

  Daniel Handler

  Children, Evil, Sound

  4 Copy quote

• People who say money doesn’t matter are like people who say cake doesn’t matter—it’s probably because they’ve already had a few slices.

  Daniel Handler

  Cake, People, Matter

  4 Copy quote

• Chestnuts in stuffing tastes like someone chewed up a tree branch and then French-kissed it into your mouth.

  Daniel Handler

  Tree, Mouths, Branches

  Daniel Handler (2012). “Why We Broke Up”, p.204, Egmont UK

  36 Copy quote

• I can see it, Ed, I leaned deeper into you, felt you nodding along with the sounds in the room, and your warmth signaled through to me from under your shirt, lovely strong, safe and right.

  Daniel Handler

  Strong, Lovely, Sound

  4 Copy quote

• It was a secret time and place, you next to me, untraceable and out of this world

  Daniel Handler

  Secret, World, Next

  Daniel Handler (2011). “Why We Broke Up”, p.226, Hachette UK

  4 Copy quote

• Money is like a child—rarely unaccompanied. When it disappears, look to those who were supposed to be keeping an eye on it while you were at the grocery store. You might also look for someone who has a lot of extra children sitting around, with long, suspicious explanations for how they got there.

  Daniel Handler

  Money, Children, Eye

  5 Copy quote

• And then of course the music sprang up, lousy rock as bold and dull as a giant potato. "Love this song," Todd said, like it was unusually brave to like what was number one on the radio.

  Daniel Handler

  Song, Rocks, Numbers

  Daniel Handler (2012). “Why We Broke Up”, p.70, Egmont UK

  4 Copy quote

• Put your hair up, Min. The secret ingredient is not your hair.

  Daniel Handler

  Hair, Hair Up, Secret

  Daniel Handler (2012). “Why We Broke Up”, p.62, Egmont UK

  4 Copy quote

• If he’s not gay and he hung out with you the whole time, he wanted to be. It’s boyfriend or want to be boyfriend or I guess gay. Those are the choices.

  Daniel Handler

  Gay, Choices, Want

  Daniel Handler (2012). “Why We Broke Up”, p.80, Egmont UK

  4 Copy quote

• Friends can make you feel that the world is smaller and less sneaky than it really is, because you know people who have similar experiences.

  Daniel Handler

  People, World, Sneaky

  53 Copy quote

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