I never tell anyone exactly how clever I am. They would be too scared.
Confidence is ignorance. If you're feeling cocky, it's because there's something you don't know.
Dreams come true all the time, just not for the dreamers
A CD. How quaint. We have these in museums.
The thing about reading is that if you are hooked, you're not going to stop just because one series is over; you're going to go and find something else.
You know you're in trouble when your own imagination starts punishing you.
A monkey glances up and sees a banana, and that's as far as he looks. A visionary looks up and sees the moon.
'Insanity... I like it."
Evolution is a theory with more holes than a Dutch dam of swiss cheese.
There is no such thing as a happy ending. Every culture has a maxim that makes this point, while nowhere in the Universe is there a single gravestone that reads 'He Loved Everything About His Life, Especially the Dying Bit at the End'.
Oh, I'm crazy all right. I do have plenty of psychoses. Multiple personality, delusional dementia, OCD. I've got them all, but most of all, I'm crazy about you.
I often meet frustrated young writers who say they've only got so far and just can't finish a book. Even if you don't happen to use what you've worked on that day, it has taught you something and you'll be amazed when you might come back to it and use it again.
Well, I don't like the first bit and I don't know the last bit. So I'm really hoping the middle bit is exceptional.
I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom.
If it looks like a Dwarf, and it smells like a Dwarf, then it's probably a Dwarf or a latrine wearing dungerees.
No matter what dimension you're in, there's a big-headed male trying to take over the world.
Don't hate me forever, Arty," whispered Holly. "I couldn't bear that.
Other men look up and down, left and right; but men like us are different. We are visionaries.
Ignorance, as they say, is usually fatal, but sometimes it can be bliss.
Trust me. I'm a genius.
Nobody's death is impending." ..."Well technically everyone's death is impending.
In my experience, boys are predictable. As soon as they think of something, they do it. Girls are smarter—they plan ahead. They think about not getting caught.
The Theory of Evolution has more holes in it than a dam made out of Swiss cheese.
I hear that you were on a date with Trouble Kelp. Are you two planning on building a bivouac any time soon?
Look!" said Foaly, pointing with some urgency into the vast steel-gray gloom, "Someone who cares!
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