Eoin Colfer Quotes - Page 9

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Why can't we for once have a meeting in Starbucks?

Eoin Colfer

Starbucks, Meetings

Eoin Colfer (2008). “Artemis Fowl: The Lost Colony”, Miramax

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Maybe I’ll keep you.” Abbot chuckled and prodded Artemis’s back with his sword. “It’d be nice to have a pet human around. I could teach you tricks.” “I have a trick for you,” said Artemis, and he fired a single blast from the gun.

Eoin Colfer

Nice, Gun, Pet

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Quickly, Holly," said Artemis urgently. "Follow those bubbles." Holly opened the throttle. "Now there's an order I never thought I'd hear from you.

Eoin Colfer

Order, Hollies, Said

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Mulch was not impressed. 'I'm not impressed,' he said.

Eoin Colfer

Said, Not Impressed, Impressed

Eoin Colfer (2007). “Artemis Fowl: The Opal Deception”, Miramax

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Miss me? Bet you did ... so would I.

Eoin Colfer

Missing, Miss Me

Eoin Colfer (2009). “And Another Thing...”, Hyperion

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I am Butler. Anything I say sounds scary.

Eoin Colfer

Scary, Sound, Butlers

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Just what we need," moaned Holly. "Artemis Fowl with magical powers.

Eoin Colfer

Hollies, Needs, Fowl

Eoin Colfer (2008). “Artemis Fowl: The Lost Colony”, Miramax

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People like me, LB, the truly great ones ... we are always alone.

Eoin Colfer

People, Always Alone, Like Me

Eoin Colfer (2009). “And Another Thing...”, Hyperion

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Careful, Mr. Spiro, guns are dangerous. Especially the end with the hole.

Eoin Colfer

Gun, Holes, Ends

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Ah, my princess. Noble steed. How does the morning find you both?

Eoin Colfer

Morning, Princess, Doe

Eoin Colfer (2014). “Artemis Fowl:”, p.733, Penguin UK

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You guys looking for my dad? People are always, like, looking for him, and he's never around. Daddy is so not here. And I mean that literally and spiritually.

Eoin Colfer

Dad, Mean, People

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The miracle of modern science. The LEP pours millions into your department, Foaly, and all you can do is send Mud Boys to the toilet.

Eoin Colfer

Boys, Miracle, Toilets

Eoin Colfer (2005). “Artemis Fowl: The Eternity Code - Book #3”, Miramax

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Thankfully the rest of the world assumed that the Irish were crazy, a theory that the Irish themselves did nothing to debunk. They had somehow got it into their heads that each fairy lugged around a pot of gold with him wherever he went. While it was true that LEP had a ransom fund, because of its officers' high-risk occupation, no human had ever taken a chunk of it yet. This didn't stop the Irish population in general from skulking around rainbows, hoping to win the supernatural lottery.

Eoin Colfer

Crazy, Taken, Winning

Eoin Colfer (2001). “Artemis Fowl”

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It was calling me, that button," he offered as his excuse. "I couldn't resist." -MULCH DIGGUMS ON A HIGHLY PRESS-ABLE BUTTON-

Eoin Colfer

Buttons, Calling, Able

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Not me," said Orion cheerily. "I'm just a teenager with hormones running wild. And may I say ,young fairy lady, they're running wild in your direction." Holly lifted her visor and looked the hormonal teenager in the eye. "This had better not be a game, Artemis. If you do not have some serious psychosis, you will be sorry." "Oh, I'm crazy, alright. I do have plenty of psychoses," said Orion Cheerily. "Multiple personality, delusional dementia, OCD. I've got them all, but most of all, I'm crazy about you.

Eoin Colfer

Running, Sorry, Crazy

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So if you're not Artemis Fowl, then who are you?" The boy extended a dripping hand straight up. "My name is Orion. I am so pleased to meet you at last. I am, of course, your servant." Holly shook the proferred hand, thinking that manners were lovely, but she really needed someone cunning and ruthless right now, and this kid didn't appear to be very cunning.

Eoin Colfer

Kids, Thinking, Boys

Eoin Colfer (2010). “Artemis Fowl and the Atlantis Complex”, p.87, Penguin UK

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Friendship isn't a science mudboy. Just do what you think is right.

Eoin Colfer

Thinking, Holly Short

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In spite of what youngsters think, parents do not get a sneaky thrill out of punishing their children.

Eoin Colfer

Children, Thinking, Parent

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Is that how you're going to take me? Scare me into voluntarily coming aboard, then steal my Ice Cube?" "It's always cubes with you," noted Foaly, somewhat randomly. "What's wrong with a nice sphere?

Eoin Colfer

Nice, Scare, Cubes

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I am not exuding anything," said Holly through gritted teeth. Orion tapped her shoulder. "I beg to differ. You're exuding right now, a wonderful aura. It's pastel blue with little dolphins.

Eoin Colfer

Blue, Hollies, Dolphins

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Artemis: I am not buoyed by that. Foaly: You are not supposed to be buoyed by that. You are supposed to be equalized. Mulch: I'm pretty sure that both of you just made really horrible jokes. But I'm not sure because I think you broke my funny bone.

Eoin Colfer

Thinking, Bones, Broke

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People are afraid of you, Arty. Girls are terrified of you. You’re a fifteen-year-old in a bespoke suit, and nobody died.

Eoin Colfer

Girl, Years, People

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Everyone says that I have no sense of humor, then I construct a perfectly sound pun around a well-known psychological condition, and it is ignored.

Eoin Colfer

Sound, Sense Of Humor, Ignored

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Hilarious, dude. You should, like, have your own show.

Eoin Colfer

Should, Shows

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...This is the only way. I will not allow humans or fairies to die when I might have prevented it.” Butler would not give up. “Listen to yourself. You sound like a... like a good guy! There’s nothing in this for you.

Eoin Colfer

Giving Up, Guy, Might

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Born: May 14, 1965
Occupation: Author
Cite this Page: Citation

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