J. B. Smoove Quotes - Page 3

Quotes about:

• I loved Peter Sellers. I thought he was the perfect mix of physical comedy with out-of-the-box humor. I loved his tone; I loved his physicality; I loved everything about what he was doing as a comedic actor.

  J. B. Smoove

  Perfect, Actors, Tone

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• You want your lady to be a contortionist. What man wouldn't want a lady who's a contortionist?

  J. B. Smoove

  Men, Want

  "Curb Your Enthusiasm's JB Smoove". Interview with Andy Seifert, www.avclub.com. June 16, 2010.

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• I never write jokes, I just try to make myself laugh.

  J. B. Smoove

  Writing, Laughing, Trying

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• Believe it or not, I write on stage. I can't write anywhere else; I have to be in a moment. I also have to challenge myself to make something funny out of a premise. I never have my own jokes written. I have to change things as I go along, and I have to entertain myself.

  J. B. Smoove

  Believe, Writing, Challenges

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• Some of the best dramatic actors have started in comedy.

  J. B. Smoove

  Actors, Comedy, Dramatic

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• It's an ongoing joke that a black man is always the first one to get killed in movies.

  J. B. Smoove

  Men, Black, Ongoing

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• When you're babysitting a kid, all you're seeing is a version of them, a small dosage.

  J. B. Smoove

  Kids, Babysitting, Dosage

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• I talked about everything, man. I've always written material that everyone can laugh at. I talked about growing up. I did a lot of physical comedy. That was my thing. I was a physical comedian. I did anything and everything from running on a treadmill, I can paint a picture on stage of anything.

  J. B. Smoove

  Running, Growing Up, Men

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• My wife and I have been together for 11 years, and seven of those married. We got married on 07/07/07. We support each other 150 percent. We have fun. We are a modern-day Sonny & Cher. I don't sing. My wife sings. We're so different, but so alike. We got that ying and yang thing going on. You see it, but you don't know how it works.

  J. B. Smoove

  Fun, Years, Wife

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• I am the comedy version of ambidextrous. I'm working with my left and right hand. I'm the two-sided coin. I'm all of those metaphors you can think of. I'm the interracial couple. I'm BET and CBS.

  J. B. Smoove

  Couple, Thinking, Hands

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• We came here to pick up chicks, not talk about dicks.

  J. B. Smoove

  Chicks, Picks

  "Fictional character: Flats". "Hall Pass", www.imdb.com. 2011.

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• Sometimes, when you get a girl pregnant, you blame the condom. His condom broke that night.

  J. B. Smoove

  Girl, Night, Blame

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• Mel Gibson is losing it. I don't know how people still supporting this dude's movies like it's all good. That dude is nuts. All you gotta do is shut him down and don't support any of his movies.

  J. B. Smoove

  Nuts, People, Support

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• Improv relies just as much on listening as it does you delivering dialogue. That's the hard for some people. Some people just concentrate on what they're going to say, and they're not listening. You have to listen in order to see where the other person is going to.

  J. B. Smoove

  Order, People, Listening

  "THAT’S HOW HE DOOZ IT! One-on-One with Comedian JB Smoove". Interview with Sergio Mims, www.ebony.com. April 2, 2012.

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• For me, standup will always be some part of my life, and other things will move around and find their place.

  J. B. Smoove

  Moving

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• I drive a big Dodge truck. I drive American cars.

  J. B. Smoove

  Car, Dodge, Truck

  "J.B. Smoove shares great Larry David stories, picks Super Bowl winner". Fox Sports' "Questions with Comedians" Interview, www.foxsports.com. January 30, 2014.

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• I have to satisfy my audience.

  J. B. Smoove

  Audience

  "Curb Your Enthusiasm's JB Smoove". Interview with Andy Seifert, www.avclub.com. June 16, 2010.

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• I've had jokes stolen a thousand times. But if you can do it better than me, you can have it. I've had jokes stolen from me in the club when I'm next on stage. And my brain will start to turn, and the gears will start turning, and I'll go onstage and create a whole new bit.

  J. B. Smoove

  Brain, Next, Gears

  "JB Smoove, comic and torturer". TheWrap.com Interview, www.reuters.com. January 20, 2012.

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• Damn! This flight attendant treating us like we won these first class tickets in a contest.

  J. B. Smoove

  Class, Firsts, Tickets

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• That's what I am; I'm a drip. You still get hydrated, you still get your nutrients, just a little at a damn time.

  J. B. Smoove

  Littles, Damn, Stills

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• Man, you can come see me six or seven times in a row and you'll never see the same show twice, because I don't like to be robotic onstage. I like to perform for that particular audience.

  J. B. Smoove

  Men, Six, Seven

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• As far as standup, everybody has a vehicle they are driving. If what you do works, it's like playing golf. If you can master that one swing over and over again, you will be successful. That's what standup is. You have to have a central move and it has to be yours. You have to own your comedy, own what you do.

  J. B. Smoove

  Moving, Successful, Golf

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• I think comedy evolves constantly. I reinvent myself all the time. I always find a way to entertain myself because I truly believe you have to entertain yourself in order to relate it the right way to your audience.

  J. B. Smoove

  Believe, Thinking, Order

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• You have to fail, man, but you cannot allow failure to stop you from doing what you must do. Failing is just as good as succeeding in a lot of ways. It's how you react to it all. You can react to success the wrong way and be a total failure. Or you can react to losing with your whole heart, learn from it, and be a huge success. In stand-up, I've learned to know when I'm burning it up or when I'm being so-so. That's experience. I learn every single time I'm on a stage.

  J. B. Smoove

  Heart, Men, Burning

  "How to Get Absolutely Anything You Want in Life". Interview with J.Rentilly, www.menshealth.com. May 27, 2014.

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• You can't take everything that is offered to you. I pass on a lot of stuff, because I truly believe that I will shine better if I could do it 200 percent rather than do it 80 percent and make it so-so.

  J. B. Smoove

  Believe, Shining, Stuff

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