Protestants Quotes

• America is a hurricane, and the only people who do not hear the sound are those fortunate if incredibly stupid and smug White Protestants who live in the center, in the serene eye of the big wind.

  Norman Mailer

  Stupid, Eye, White

  1959 Advertisements for Myself,'Advertisement for "Games and Ends"'.

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• Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.

  Dave Barry

  Inspirational, Funny, Sports

  Dave Barry (1985). “Dave Barry's Stay Fit and Healthy Until You're Dead”, p.32, Rodale

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• When I told the people of Northern Ireland that I was an atheist, a woman in the audience stood up and said, 'Yes, but is it the God of the Catholics or the God of the Protestants in whom you don't believe?'

  Quentin Crisp

  Peace, Atheist, Believe

  "The Wit and Wisdom of Quentin Crisp". Book by Quentin Crisp, 1984.

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• I went off to college, a good, middle-class, very proper college, a Brethren institution, where two years of Bible study are required for graduation. It was a good, sound, thorough, but completely biased evaluation of the Bible, and I was delighted with it, because it helped to document my doubts; it gave me a framework within which I could be critical.My independent study continued for 20 years after this. So I do know the Bible very well from a Protestant point of view.

  Madalyn Murray O'Hair

  Independent, College, Years

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• The only really respectable Protestants are the fundamentalists. Unfortunately, they are also palpable idiots.

  H. L. Mencken

  Superstitions, Belief, Idiot

  H.L. Mencken (2013). “Minority Report”, p.121, Knopf

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• As a Protestant minister's son I am partial to apocalypses.

  Matt Ruff

  Son, Apocalypse, Ministers

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• As long as leadership from above was not lacking, the people fulfilled their duty and obligation overwhelmingly. Whether Protestant pastor or Catholic priest, both together and particularly at the first flare, there really existed in both camps but a single holy German Reich, for whose existence and future each man turned to his own heaven.

  Adolf Hitler

  Religious, Men, Long

  Adolf Hitler (1971). “Mein Kampf”, Mariner Books

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• Protestant parents still keep a Bible handy in the house, so that the children can study it, and one of the first things the little boys and girls learn is to be righteous and holy and not piss against the wall. They study those passages more than they study any others, except those which incite to masturbation. Those they hunt out and study in private.

  Mark Twain

  Bible, Girl, Children

  Mark Twain (1995). “The Bible According to Mark Twain: Writings on Heaven, Eden, and the Flood”, p.256, University of Georgia Press

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• When the epistemologists' concept of consciousness first became popular, it seems to have been in part a transformed application of the Protestant notion of conscience."Consciousness" was imported to play in the mental world the role played by light in the mechanical world.

  Gilbert Ryle

  Play, Light, Firsts

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• Jews wait for the Lord, Protestants sing hymns to him, Catholics say mass and eat him.

  Walker Percy

  Hymns, Waiting, Catholic

  Walker Percy (2011). “Love in the Ruins: The Adventures of a Bad Catholic at a Time Near the End of the World”, p.206, Open Road Media

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• A Protestant, if he wants aid or advice on any matter, can only go to his solicitor.

  Benjamin Disraeli

  Advice, Matter, Want

  'Lothair' (1870) ch. 27

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• We have deluded ourselves into believing the myth that capitalism grew and prospered out of the Protestant ethic of hard work and sacrifices. Capitalism was built on the exploitation of black slaves and continues to thrive on the exploitation of the poor, both black and white, both here and abroad.

  Martin Luther King, Jr.

  Believe, Hard Work, Black And White

  "Secretary Zinke, we can't afford to ignore diversity" by Andre Perry, www.cnn.com. March 27, 2018.

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• Plantie is a very strong Protestant, that is to say, he's against all churches, especially the Protestant: and he thinks a lot of Buddha, Karma and Confucius. He is also a bit of an anarchist and three or four years ago he took up Einstein and vitamins.

  Joyce Cary

  Karma, Strong, Thinking

  Joyce Cary (1958). “First trilogy: Herself surprised: To be a pilgrim. The horse's mouth”

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• If we move in the direction of biblial absolutism how can we escape turning the New Testament into a Christian Torah and the gospel into a new law? Once we do that, religious fascism with all its sectarian ugliness cannot be far away. Far better a mistaken Christian (a heretic) who has somehow caught the Spirit of Christ, than an orthodox Protestant who thinks that the Spirit is mediated to him through the letter of correct theology.

  Robert D. Brinsmead

  Bible, Christian, Religious

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• The Catholic Church is a thousand times better than your Protestant Church upon that question [of damnation]. The Catholic Church believes in purgatory - that is, a place where a fellow can get a chance to make a motion for a new trial.

  Robert Green Ingersoll

  Believe, Catholic, Religion

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• ...secular journalists... tend to accept uncritically the oft - repeated Evangelical Protestant and Conservative Roman Catholic definitions that the Bible is anti - gay. If these people were honest, they would have to admit that the Bible is also pro - slavery and anti - women.

  John Shelby Spong

  Gay, People, Catholic

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• I believe in an America that is officially neither Catholic, Protestant nor Jewish; where no public official either requests or accepts instructions on public policy from the Pope, the National Council of Churches or any other ecclesiastical source; where no religious body seeks to impose its will directly or indirectly upon the general populace or the public acts of its officials; and where religious liberty is so indivisible that an act against one church is treated as an act against all.

  John F. Kennedy

  Religious, Believe, America

  Address to the Greater Houston Ministerial Association, delivered 12 September 1960 at the Rice Hotel in Houston, TX

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• Bid me to live, and I will live
  Thy Protestant to be:
  Or bid me love, and I will give
  A loving heart to thee,
  A heart as soft, a heart as kind,
  A heart as sound and free
  As in the whole world thou canst find,
  That heart I'll give to thee.

  Robert Herrick

  Love, Life, Heart

  'To Anthea, Who May Command Him Anything'

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• I do know the Bible very well from a Protestant point of view - which is what, along with my reason, entitles me to refute it. You can't rationally reject something until you know all about it.

  Madalyn Murray O'Hair

  Views, Reason, Point Of View

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• To be deep in history, is to cease to be Protestant.

  John Henry Newman

  Cease

  John Henry Newman, Dave Armstrong (2012). “The Quotable Newman: A Definitive Guide to His Central Thoughts and Ideas”, p.184, Sophia Institute Press

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• The decline of witch-belief was . . . entirely the product of religious skepticism. . . . The Catholic Church did not reform itself on this matter; it was forced by outside pressure to reform. To be sure, the Protestant churches were no better in this regard; it is simply that they had less time - only two or three centuries - to engage in the torching of witches. After all, John Wesley, the founder of Methodism, stated quite correctly that disbelief in witches meant a disbelief in the Bible.

  S. T. Joshi

  Religious, Two, Catholic

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• The Catholics have a Pope. Protestants laugh at them, and yet the Pope is capable of intellectual advancement. In addition to this, the Pope is mortal, and the church cannot be afflicted with the same idiot forever. The Protestants have a book for their Pope. The book cannot advance. Year after year, and century after century, the book remains as ignorant as ever.

  Robert Green Ingersoll

  Bible, Book, Biblical

  Robert Green Ingersoll (1902). “Discussions”

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• In reality, there are no biblical literalists, only selective literalists. By abolishing slavery and ordaining women, millions of Protestants have gone far beyond biblical literalism. It's time we did the same for homophobia.

  William Sloane Coffin

  Biblical, Gay, Reality

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• In all countries, in all centuries, the primary reason for government to set up schools is to undermine the politically weak by convincing their children that the leaders are good and their policies are wise. The core is religious intolerance. The sides simply change between the Atheists, Catholics, Protestants, Unitarians, etc., depending whether you are talking about the Soviet Union, the Austro-Hungarian Empire, America, etc. A common second reason is to prepare the boys to go to war and the girls to cheer them on.

  Marshall Fritz

  Girl, Wise, Country

  "The Separation of School and State Alliance". Interview with Mary Leggewie, www.homeschoolchristian.com. June 3, 1999.

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• The Jew...is not content merely to destroy Christianity, but he preaches the gospel of Judaism; he not only assails the Catholic or the Protestant faith, but he incites to the unbelief, and then imposes on those whose faith he has undermined his own conception of the world, of morality and of life. He is engaged in his historic mission, the annihilation of the religion of Christ.

  Bernard Lazare

  Catholic, World, Morality

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