Jerry Seinfeld Hilarious Quotes

Quotes about: Hilarious

• People who read the tabloids deserve to be lied to.

  Jerry Seinfeld

  Hilarious, Lying, People

• According to most studies, people's number one fear is public speaking. Number two is death. Death is number two. Does that sound right? This means to the average person, if you go to a funeral, you're better off in the casket than doing the eulogy.

  Jerry Seinfeld

  Funny, Motivational, Death

• Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem.Maybe you should get rid of the body before you do the wash.

  Jerry Seinfeld

  Funny, Hilarious, Witty

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

• If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?

  Jerry Seinfeld

  Inspirational, Funny, Hilarious

• Introducing 'Lite': the new way to spell 'Light'; but with twenty per cent fewer letters.

  Jerry Seinfeld

  Hilarious, Light, Twenties

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• twitter
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• email
• linkedin