The best way to get along is never to forgive an enemy or forget a friend.
Never above you. Never below you. Always beside you.
Gossip is the art of saying nothing in a way that leaves practically nothing unsaid.
An optimist is someone who gets treed by a lion but enjoys the scenery.
A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.
The same thing happened today that happened yesterday, only to different people.
We must not indulge in unfavorable views of mankind, since by doing it we make bad men believe they are no worse than others, and we teach the good that they are good in vain.
Money sometimes makes fools of important persons, but it may also make important persons of fools.
Today's gossip is tomorrow's headline.
Hollywood is a place where they place you under contract instead of under observation.
She's been on more laps than a napkin.
I usually get my stuff from people who promised somebody else that they would keep it a secret.
Good evening, Mr. and Mrs. America from border to border and coast to coast and all the ships at sea. Let's go to press.
It's a sure sign of summer if the chair gets up when you do.
The reason they're called the opposite sex is because every time you think you have your wife fooled - it's just the opposite!
The only ones who like Milton Berle are his mother - and the public.
Nothing recedes like success.
Broadway is a main artery of New York life - the hardened artery.
The Chicago mobs... They practiced their own perverted form of "survival of the fittest." Where the strong clawed their way to the top of a criminal empire. And the weak died in a hail of machine gun bullets.
A pessimist is one who builds dungeons in the air.
Hollywood is where they shoot too many pictures and not enough actors.
I never lost a friend I wanted to keep.
The way to become famous fast is to throw a brick at someone who is famous.
Here lies Walter Winchell in the dirt he loved so well.
America - love it or leave it.
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