... no matter how nice you are to some people, they'll turn their back on you the second they get the chance.
I think if everyone would write down the funny stories from their own childhoods, the world would be a better place.
You can't expect everyone to have the same dedication as you.
Because it's our choices that makes us who we are...
See, when you're a little kid, nobody ever warns you that you've got an expiration date. One day you're hot stuff and the next day you're a dirt sandwich.
You and your group of nerds fall into a pit and it's full of dynamite and you blow up. The End.
Well, the problem is, it's not easy for me to think of ways to improve myself, because I'm pretty much one of the best people I know.
Monkeys can't talk, stupid!
So I've started wearing sweatpants to bed because I really don't need Santa seeing me in my underwear.
I'm probably something like 95% chicken nugget
I'm having a seriously hard time getting used to the fact that summer is over and I have to get out of bed every morning to go to school.
My advice to authors would be to try to do something original rather than to try to anticipate what the market is looking for.
I don't know if this makes me a bad person or whatever, but it's hard for me to get interested in other people's vacations.
I don't know what a guy needs to do to impress a girl these days.
I`m basically one of the best people I know.
Youre gonna grow up and marry some ice cream! Haha!
fish and visitors stink in 3 days.
I've seen a lot of movies where a kid my age finds out he's got magical powers and then gets invited to go away to some special school. Well, if I've got an invitation coming, now would be the perfect time to get it
The only reason I get out of bed at all on weekends is because eventually I can't stand the taste of my own breath any more.
Mom is always saying I'm a smart kid, but that I just don't apply myself.
I realised all the good ideas were taken before I was even born.
The best person I know is Myself.
But the thing I’m finding out is some people don’t really appreciate it when you’r trying to be helpful.
I'll be famous one day, but for now I'm stuck in middle school with a bunch of morons." - Greg Heffley,
First of all, let me get this straight: This is a JOURNAL, not a diary. I know what it says on the cover, but when Mom went out to buy this thing I SPECIFICALLY told her to get one that didn't say 'diary' on it.
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