Johnny Carson Quotes - Page 3

Quotes about:

• As you all know by now, this is the 51st annual Academy Awards. Two hours of sparkling entertainment spread out over a four-hour show.

  Johnny Carson

  Awards, Two, Four

  "The 51st Annual Academy Awards", TV Special, www.imdb.com. 1979.

  5 Copy quote

• If you're happy in what you're doing, you'll like yourself, you'll have inner peace.

  Johnny Carson

  Doing What You Love, Work You Love, Careers

  10 Copy quote

• I see a lot of new faces. Especially on the old faces.

  Johnny Carson

  Faces, New Faces

  "The 51st Annual Academy Awards", TV Special, www.imdb.com. 1979.

  4 Copy quote

• Audiences have proved time and again that they don't want a steady diet of any entertainer airing his social views - especially if he's a comedian.

  Johnny Carson

  Views, Comedian, Want

  Source: www.alex-haley.com

  7 Copy quote

• The only thing money gives you is the freedom of not worrying about money.

  Johnny Carson

  Funny, Money, Freedom

  10 Copy quote

• They say atomic rad-i-ation can hurt your reproductive organs. My answer is, so can a hockey stick. But we don't stop building them.

  Johnny Carson

  Hurt, Hockey, Answers

  5 Copy quote

• I'm an entertainer, not a commentator. If you're a comedian your job is to make people laugh.

  Johnny Carson

  Jobs, People, Laughing

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  7 Copy quote

• New York is an exciting town where something is happening all the time, most unsolved.

  Johnny Carson

  Funny, Time, New York

  17 Copy quote

• I feel the one sensible thing you can do is try to live in a way that pleases you. If you don't hurt anybody else, what you do is your own business.

  Johnny Carson

  Hurt, Trying, Way

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  11 Copy quote

• Happiness is seeing your son drafted the same day he's been accepted to an expensive college.

  Johnny Carson

  Son, College, Accepted

  29 Copy quote

• George Burns has been on my show twenty or thirty times, or maybe more. How can you turn down a guy that age?

  Johnny Carson

  Guy, Age, Twenties

  23 Copy quote

• Americans, too many of them, take themselves too seriously. You're going to get rapped - by the viewers, by the sponsors and by the network brass - if you joke about doctors, lawyers, dentists, scientists, bus drivers, I don't care who. You can't make a joke about Catholics, Negroes, Jews, Italians, politicians, dogs or cats. In fact, politicians, dogs and cats are the most sacred institutions in America.

  Johnny Carson

  Dog, Cat, Doctors

  Source: www.alex-haley.com

  27 Copy quote

• The best way to thaw a frozen turkey? Blow in it's ear.

  Johnny Carson

  Blow, Turkeys, Frozen

  21 Copy quote

• A two-pound turkey and a fifty-pound cranberry-that's Thanksgiving dinner at Three Mile Island.

  Johnny Carson

  Fun, Islands, Turkeys

  17 Copy quote

• I couldn't care less what anybody says about me. I live my life, especially my personal life, strictly for myself... Whatever you do, you're going to be criticized. I feel the one sensible thing you can do is try to live in a way that pleases you.

  Johnny Carson

  Life, Trying, Care

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  10 Copy quote

• I loved the towns I grew up in as a boy, and after I became a celebrity, I went back several times. I would have had the time of my life seeing the old places and the old faces again, but the attitude of those same people was, "I guess you're so big we bore you now."

  Johnny Carson

  Attitude, Boys, Bores You

  Source: www.alex-haley.com

  27 Copy quote

• It was so hot today that Burger King was singing, "if you want it your way, cook it yourself".

  Johnny Carson

  Funny, Kings, Singing

  The Tonight Show, Summer, 1977.

  17 Copy quote

• He's so fat, he can be his own running mate.

  Johnny Carson

  Sarcastic, Running, Obesity

  8 Copy quote

• The vast majority of us don't want to face the fact that we're in the middle of a sweeping social revolution. In sex. In spiritual values. In opposition to wars no one wants. In opposition to government big-brotherhood. In civil rights. In basic human goals. They're all facets of a general upheaval.

  Johnny Carson

  Spiritual, Sex, War

  Source: www.alex-haley.com

  14 Copy quote

• I work because I enjoy what I'm doing, and the fact that I make money at it - big money - is a fine-and-dandy side fact.

  Johnny Carson

  Facts, Sides, Making Money

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

  17 Copy quote

• People are hypocrites. If you ask them what they want to see on TV, they'll tell you they want better quality programming. And then what do they watch? 'Gilligan's Island.'

  Johnny Carson

  Hypocrite, Islands, People

  4 Copy quote

• Money gives me just one big thing that's really important, and that's the freedom of not having to worry about money.

  Johnny Carson

  Giving, Worry, Important

  Source: www.alex-haley.com

  13 Copy quote

• I think it's almost immoral to keep on with a marriage that's really bad. It just gets more and more rotten and vindictive and everybody gets more and more hurt. There's not enough honesty about marriage, I think. I wish more people would face the truth about their marital situations.

  Johnny Carson

  Hurt, Honesty, Thinking

  Source: www.alex-haley.com

  10 Copy quote

• Only lie about the future.

  Johnny Carson

  Lying

  8 Copy quote

• Happiness is being served with a paternity suit on your 75th birthday.

  Johnny Carson

  Suits

  5 Copy quote

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