Gabriel Iglesias Quotes

Quotes about:

• I don't want to die tomorrow knowing I could've had a piece of cake tonight.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Cake, Knowing, Tonight

  125 Copy quote

• You know, a lot of people think that just 'cause you work out, lift weights, eat right, and do what people tell you to do that you'll live a long live, maybe you will. But, why do people measure life by the years instead about how good the years were.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Thinking, Years, Long

  121 Copy quote

• There's 5 levels of fatness! Fluffy is one of the levels. There's big, healthy, husky, fluffy and damn.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Healthy, Levels, Fluffy

  84 Copy quote

• Why do people measure life by the years instead of how good the years were?

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Years, People

  74 Copy quote

• I'm not fat. It's just my awesomeness swelling up inside of me.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Awesomeness, Fats, Swelling

  16 Copy quote

• With all the classes they offer at school, how come they don't have one for common sense?

  Gabriel Iglesias

  School, Class, Common Sense

  43 Copy quote

• I drink diet coke so I can eat regular cake.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Cake, Coke, Drink

  Twitter post from Nov 3, 2009

  55 Copy quote

• Life is measured by how you lived it, not by the years.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Years, Life Is

  44 Copy quote

• Me racist? The only race I hate is the one you have to run.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Running, Hate, Race

  "'It was a crank call': family seeks action against 911 caller in Walmart shooting'" by Jon Swaine, www.theguardian.com. September 26, 2014.

  56 Copy quote

• I'm not fat. I'm fluffy!

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Fluffy, Fats

  "Gabriel Iglesias: I'm Not Fat... I'm Fluffy". Comedy, www.imdb.com. 2009.

  13 Copy quote

• You live by the cake, you die by the cake.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Cake, Live By, Dies

  37 Copy quote

• Anything is possible as long as you're focused, determined and you really want to do it.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Long, Want, Determined

  "Gabriel Iglesias talks about 'The Fluffy Movie', his life and cake". Interview with Jeff Mitchell, www.phoenixfilmfestival.com. July 22, 2014.

  33 Copy quote

• Some people can handle alcohol. You know who you are. Some people can't handle alcohol. The police know who you are.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  People, Alcohol, Police

  32 Copy quote

• I'm a big boy, but I can get jiggy with it. Ladies, I will go to dance clubs, and I will tear it up hardcore for a good 30 seconds.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Funny, Boys, Tears

  72 Copy quote

• When you have nothing but big friends, you never get into arguments - except one. And that is, who is the biggest? I'll let you know right now, there's only one way to settle this. We all get in a bus and we go to Disney and we get on a roller coaster - whoever gets the least amount of clicks on the safety bar is the big one.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Safety, Bars, Way

  49 Copy quote

• Kids, man, they're way too honest. They're like mini-alcoholics.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Honesty, Kids, Men

  11 Copy quote

• You know what I learned about Hawaiians? They're just blown up Mexicans!

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Hawaiians, Knows

  4 Copy quote

• The best advice bro: is think big, as big as you can possibly think, and shoot for that. The bigger you aim for, the bigger you're going to be. Set the standards for yourself as high as you possibly can and also surround yourself with people who have the same visions you have.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Thinking, People, Advice

  Source: www.themonitor.com

  6 Copy quote

• You can't be bad ass in a car that kills gas like I kill tacos.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Bad Ass, Car, Tacos

  19 Copy quote

• We can choose our family. We can't choose our relatives.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Family, Our Family

  27 Copy quote

• People can relate to someone who isn't perfect.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  People, Perfect, Relate

  Source: goseetalk.com

  5 Copy quote

• I had to travel half way across the world to be called an American.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Half, World, Way

  38 Copy quote

• I'm not on a diet. And it's funny cause people go 'Well, then why do you drink diet soda?' So I can eat regular cake.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Cake, People, Soda

  16 Copy quote

• Why would anybody connect to someone who has everything going for them? It's the person who has faults that people want to connect to. So people identify with certain insecurities on stage and just by me talking about my diabetes people come up to me after the show and tell me "Gabe, my blood sugar is out of control and I feel you". That's the first thing they say, they say "I feel you!".

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Blood, Talking, People

  Source: goseetalk.com

  14 Copy quote

• If you surround yourself with a bunch of guys who no mas se quieren puro pari and are like, "Aaah, let's go get some chicks." Guess what? That's going to slow you down and keep your head somewhere else.

  Gabriel Iglesias

  Somewhere Else, Guy, Down And

  Source: www.themonitor.com

  8 Copy quote

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