Garrison Keillor Funny Quotes

Quotes about: Funny

• Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.

  Garrison Keillor

  Funny, Christian, Religious

• A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.

  Garrison Keillor

  Love, Funny, Christmas

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

• God writes a lot of comedy... the trouble is, he's stuck with so many bad actors who don't know how to play funny.

  Garrison Keillor

  Funny, Life, Encouraging

  "Happy to be Here". Book by Garrison Keillor, 1983.

• There is almost no marital problem that can't be helped enormously by taking off your clothes.

  Garrison Keillor

  Funny, Clothes, Comedy

  "The Writer's Almanac", October 04, 2005.

• They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days.

  Garrison Keillor

  Funny, Death, Nice

• The funniest line in English is 'Get it?' When you say that, everyone chortles.

  Garrison Keillor

  Funny, Lines

  Garrison Keillor (1990). “We Are Still Married: Stories and Letters”, p.14, Penguin

• A cruise ship is a floating town of lazy people.

  Garrison Keillor

  Funny, Travel, Lazy People

• If you lived today as if it were your last, you'd buy up a box of rockets and fire them all off, wouldn't you?

  Garrison Keillor

  Funny, Humor, Fire

  Garrison Keillor (1990). “Lake Wobegon Days”, p.133, Penguin

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