Craig Kilborn Quotes - Page 2

Quotes about:

• Larry Flynt, running for governor of California. His goal - change our state bird to the spread eagle.

  Craig Kilborn

  Running, Eagles, California

  5 Copy quote

• In Louisiana, President Bush met with over 15,000 National Guard troops. Here's the weird part, nobody remembers seeing him there.

  Craig Kilborn

  President, Troops, Louisiana

  4 Copy quote

• There are 300,000 new jobs and Bush said he's confused, 'Can I take credit for good news that I didn't even make up?'

  Craig Kilborn

  Jobs, Confused, New Job

  4 Copy quote

• President Bush announced a billion dollar mission to the moon and Mars. He came up with a snappy new slogan - to drill where no man has drilled before.

  Craig Kilborn

  Moon, Men, President

  4 Copy quote

• With Iraq plunging into chaos and gas prices at record highs President Bush took time out this weekend for a ride on his bicycle, but unfortunately he fell off and sustained cuts to his face and hands. Apparently Bush was distracted by the enormous responsibilities of the presidency. I'm just kidding. He hit some gravel or something.

  Craig Kilborn

  Responsibility, Cutting, Weekend

  4 Copy quote

• The prison scandal is really hurting President Bush's poll numbers. In fact, I hear he's already working on his concession smirk.

  Craig Kilborn

  Hurt, Numbers, President

  10 Copy quote

• Saddam Hussein is about to face trial and George Bush wants to execute him. Not because of the war crimes, but because Saddam is beating him in the polls.

  Craig Kilborn

  War, Trials, Hussein

  4 Copy quote

• Ironically, the possibility that the president dodged his military service has increased his approval ratings with Democrats by 80 percent.

  Craig Kilborn

  Military, Approval Rating, President

  4 Copy quote

• President Bush is in the hot seat over Iraqi pre-war intelligence. Remember the good ol' days when the only thing the president was trying to cover up was a stain?

  Craig Kilborn

  War, Trying, President

  4 Copy quote

• Martha Stewart was convicted of four counts of lying and obstruction of justice and could serve up to 20 years in Congress.

  Craig Kilborn

  Lying, Years, Justice

  4 Copy quote

• Bush said the unemployment situation is turning around. Last week alone, 5,000 people started working for John Kerry.

  Craig Kilborn

  People, Unemployment, Lasts

  4 Copy quote

• On Sunday, the president flies to the Azores islands to attend a summit with British Prime Minister Tony Blair and Spanish Prime Minister Jose Aznar, and here's my prediction: Bush gets voted off.

  Craig Kilborn

  Sunday, Islands, President

  4 Copy quote

• I think mankind is overly sensitive, very needy, greedy, and flawed.

  Craig Kilborn

  Thinking, Greedy, Sensitive

  4 Copy quote

• I enjoyed retirement the right way linguine con vongole, red wine and plenty of truffle cheese.

  Craig Kilborn

  Retirement, Wine, Red

  12 Copy quote

• Senator Hillary Clinton is attacking President Bush for breaking his campaign promise to cut carbon dioxide emissions, saying a promise made, a promise broken. And then out of habit, she demanded that Bush spend the night on the couch.

  Craig Kilborn

  Cutting, Night, Broken

  8 Copy quote

• I have a wonderful respect for old people.

  Craig Kilborn

  People, Wonderful, Old People

  4 Copy quote

• I don't do well around the angry, bitter and emotionally fragile among us, which may eliminate 70% of the population.

  Craig Kilborn

  Population, May, Bitter

  4 Copy quote

• People here in Los Angeles are disgusted now about a sex scandal involving Arnold Schwarzenegger. Apparently for seven years, he carried on a sexual relationship with his own wife.

  Craig Kilborn

  Sex, Years, People

  7 Copy quote

• Yesterday Jerry Springer bowed out of the Ohio Senate race. He said, 'If I can't run the most embarrassing campaign in America, then I'm out of here.'

  Craig Kilborn

  Running, Race, Ohio

  7 Copy quote

• Over ten thousand people have signed a petition to recall Governor Schwarzenegger. I'm sorry, that is next year's joke.

  Craig Kilborn

  Sorry, Years, People

  4 Copy quote

• Apparently, six women claim that Arnold Schwarzenegger groped them while working on his movies. Hats off to these women who admit they worked on Arnold's movies.

  Craig Kilborn

  Hats, Six, Schwarzenegger

  4 Copy quote

• The big political news, Arnold Schwarzenegger announced he's running for governor of California, and already, people are chanting, 'Four more vowels, four more vowels.

  Craig Kilborn

  Running, California, People

  8 Copy quote

• President Bush spent last night calling world leaders to support the war with Iraq and it is sad when the most powerful man on earth is yelling, 'I know you're there, pick up, pick up.

  Craig Kilborn

  Powerful, War, Night

  8 Copy quote

• As fighting in Iraq intensifies, President Bush delivered his supplemental war budget to Congress. The money will cover 30 days of fighting, then we'll be sent one war every other month until we cancel our subscription.

  Craig Kilborn

  War, Fighting, Iraq

  4 Copy quote

• New rumors that Saddam Hussein is planning to flee to a castle in Libya with 10 billion dollars. Now President Bush doesn't know whether to nuke him or give him a tax cut.

  Craig Kilborn

  Cutting, Giving, Rumor

  8 Copy quote

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