Granny Quotes - Page 2

• I think that sick people in Ankh-Morpork generally go to a vet. It's generally a better bet. There's more pressure on a vet to get it right. People say "it was god's will" when granny dies, but they get angry when they lose a cow.

  Terry Pratchett

  Thinking, People, Sick

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• And just as it is with all proper grannies, she ordered me into my pink bunny jammies.

  Berkeley Breathed

  Bunnies, Jammies

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• You can con God and get away with it, Granny said, if you do so with charm and wit. If you live your life with imagination and verve, God will play along just to see what outrageously entertaining thing you'll do next.

  Dean Koontz

  Play, Imagination, Live Your Life

  Dean Koontz (2014). “Odd Thomas: You Are Destined to Be Together Forever (Short Story)”, p.5, Bantam

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• Do you know how wizards like to be buried?" "Yes!" "Well, how?" Granny Weatherwax paused at the bottom of the stairs. "Reluctantly.

  Terry Pratchett

  Wizards, Stairs, Buried

  Terry Pratchett (2012). “The Wit and Wisdom of Discworld”, p.22, Harper Collins

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• I used to get a lot of people saying 'Oh, you are such a lucky granny.' But the fact of the matter is you can be a grandma at 35 these days.

  Jo Brand

  Grandma, People, Lucky

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• I don't want to hurt you, Mistress Weatherwax," said Mrs Gogol. "That's good," said Granny. "I don't want you to hurt me either.

  Terry Pratchett

  Hurt, Mistress, Want

  "Witches Abroad". Book by ‎Terry Pratchett, 1991.

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• Granny Weatherwax was often angry. She considered it one of her strong points. Genuine anger was one of the world's greatest creative forces. But you had to learn how to control it. That didn't mean you let it trickle away. it meant you dammed it, carefully, let it develop a working head, let it drown whole valleys of the mind and then, just when the whole structure was about to collapse, opened a tiny pipeline at the base and let the iron-hard stream of wrath power the turbines of revenge.

  Terry Pratchett

  Strong, Revenge, Mean

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• I saved a man's life once," said Granny. "Special medicine, twice a day. Boiled water with a bit of berry juice in it. Told him I'd bought it from the dwarves. That's the biggest part of doct'rin, really. Most people'll get over most things if they put their minds to it, you just have to give them an interest.

  Terry Pratchett

  Men, Dwarves, Medicine

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• Did Lovelace's forces find you? Did Jabor break in?" He spoke slowly through clenched teeth. "I went to get a newspaper" This is getting better and better! I shook my head regretfully. "You should leave such a dangerous assignment to people better qualified: next time ask an old granny, or a toddler-

  Jonathan Stroud

  People, Get Better, Teeth

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• But you ain't part of it, are you?" said Granny conversationally. "You try, but you always find yourself watchin' yourself watchin' people, eh? Never quite believin' anything? Thinkin' the wrong thoughts?

  Terry Pratchett

  People, Finding Yourself, Trying

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• There's something unrefined about a reading woman, they always reek of the lamp. How can she grow up to be a lady if she's always got her nose in a book? Granny Rudin

  Florence King

  Growing Up, Book, Reading

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• Blessings be on this house," Granny said, perfunctorily. It was always a good opening remark for a witch. It concentrated people's minds on what other things might be on this house.

  Terry Pratchett

  Blessing, People, House

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• Divers alarums and excursions', she read, uncertainly. 'That means lots of terrible happenings, said Magrat. 'You always put that in plays.' Alarums and what?', said Nanny Ogg, who hadn't been listening. Excursions', said Magrat patienly. Oh.' Nanny Ogg brightened a bit. 'The seaside would be nice,' she said. Oh do shut up, Gytha,' said Granny Weatherwax. 'They're not for you. They're only for divers, like it says. Probably so they can recover from all them alarums.

  Terry Pratchett

  Nice, Mean, Play

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• There was Kir, red hair combed back and That Expression on his sharp face. Even his freckles looked serious. I'd given up wondering how a freckle-faced teenager could look so much like a disapproving granny.

  Lilith Saintcrow

  Teenager, Hair, Expression

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• Granny was an old-fashioned witch. She didn’t do good for people, she did right by them.

  Terry Pratchett

  People, Witch, Old Fashioned

  Terry Pratchett (2012). “A Blink of the Screen: Collected Short Fiction”, p.235, Random House

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• Granny Weatherwax was not lost. She wasn't the kind of person who ever became lost. It was just that, at the moment, while she knew exactly where SHE was, she didn't know the position of anywhere else.

  Terry Pratchett

  Kind, Moments, Lost

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• Find the story, Granny Weatherwax always said. She believed that the world was full of story shapes. If you let them, they controlled you. But if you studied them, if you found out about them... you could use them, you could change them.

  Terry Pratchett

  Stories, Use, World

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• I don't hold with paddlin' with the occult," said Granny firmly. "Once you start paddlin' with the occult you start believing in spirits, and when you start believing in spirits you start believing in demons, and then before you know where you are you're believing in gods. And then you're in trouble." "But all them things exist," said Nanny Ogg. "That's no call to go around believing in them. It only encourages 'em.

  Terry Pratchett

  Believe, Ems, Nannies

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• For the first time in her life Granny wondered whether there might be something important in all these books people were setting store by these days, although she was opposed to books on strict moral grounds, since she had heard that many of them were written by dead people and therefore it stood to reason reading them would be as bad as necromancy. Among the many things in the infinitely varied universe with which Granny did not hold was talking to dead people, who by all accounts had enough troubles of their own.

  Terry Pratchett

  Reading, Book, Talking

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• Granny sighed. "You have learned something," she said, and thought it safe to insert a touch of sternness into her voice. "They say a little knowledge is a dangerous thing, but it is not one half so bad as a lot of ignorance.

  Terry Pratchett

  Ignorance, Voice, Half

  Terry Pratchett (2009). “Equal Rites: (Discworld Novel 3)”, p.80, Random House

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• Granny bit her lip. She was never quite certain about children, thinking of them-when she thought about them at all-as coming somewhere between animals and people. She understood babies. You put milk in one end and kept the other as clean as possible. Adults were even easier, because they did the feeding and cleaning themselves. But in between was a world of experience that she had never really inquired about. As far as she was aware, you just tried to stop them catching anything fatal and hoped that it would all turn out all right.

  Terry Pratchett

  Baby, Children, Thinking

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• My granny Torrelli says when you are angry with someone, so angry you are thinking hateful things, so angry maybe you want to punch them, then you should think of the good things about them, and the nice things they've said, and why you liked them in the first place.

  Sharon Creech

  Nice, Thinking, Want

  Sharon Creech (2009). “Granny Torrelli Makes Soup”, p.5, Harper Collins

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• And now you're off to Port Caynn. Watch them sailor lads. They'll have your skirts up and a babe in your belly afore you know what you're about." "Everyone keep warning me about sailors," I complained. "Why can't someone tell the sailors to stay clear of me?" Granny snorted. "Oh, you're the fierce one now! Just take care no one else catches you unawares and knocks you on the nob!

  Tamora Pierce

  Sex, Watches, Warning

  Tamora Pierce (2012). “Beka Cooper: The Hunt Records”, p.351, Random House Books for Young Readers

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• Gran, for the gods' love, it's talk like yours that starts riots!" I said keeping my voice down. "Will you just put a stopper in it?" She looked at me and sighed. "Girl, do you ever take a breath and wonder if folk don't put out bait for you? To see if you'll bite? You'll never get a man if you don't relax." My dear old Gran. It's a wonder her children aren't every one of them as mad as priests, if she mangles their wits as she mangles mine. "Granny, "I told her, "this is dead serious. I can't relax, no more than any Dog. I'm not shopping for a man. That's the last thing I need.

  Tamora Pierce

  Girl, Dog, Children

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• Granny Ditto always referred to perfume as "smell good" and for me it's an essential. I have a sweetheart who's extremely allergic to most scents, so I have to be extra careful - as well as creative - in the smell department. The key, I've found, are essential oils, which come in all kinds of 100% natural scents.

  Beth Ditto

  Keys, Essential Oils, Smell

  "What would Beth Ditto do?" by Beth Ditto, www.theguardian.com. July 6, 2007.

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