Jesus Quotes - Page 30

• Almost everyone has or will experience getting dumped in their lifetime. Unless, of course, you're a nun. Jesus can't dump nuns.

  Jenny McCarthy

  Lifetime, Dump, Nun

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• Usually, old ladies tell me to find Jesus. Look, I'm just trying to find some chai and a good vegan muffin.

  Davey Havok

  Trying, Muffins, Looks

  "Despairing with AFI" by Kate Stroup in Rolling Stone Magazine, March 25, 2003.

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• I remember hearing that the spirit was always next to you, so I would always make room in my bed for the spirit ... I'd make room for the teddy bears, Jesus and me. And then I'd wake up in the morning, and I'd squashed 'em all.

  Michael Fassbender

  Morning, Bed, Wake Up

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• And the news got worse. It appeared that there was this whole other person Jesus Christ whose birthday a lot of people tended to confuse with mine. I was personally outraged. It was a long time before I forgave the Lord for that.

  Ava Gardner

  Long, People, News

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• Jesus, music has always been my first love. I use music in my work because it's the fastest way to an emotional place. You hear a song, and that memory comes right back-- you're there... Making music is immediate, and it's all about you. If you're playing guitar, the feeling comes through-- the way you bend the note, the intensity with which you hit the strings. With making films, although it's real emotion, it's false emotion. You're lying.

  Johnny Depp

  Song, Memories, Real

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• Throughout human history, countries rise and fall. But not America-we continue to rise and rise, like dough, until Jesus bakes us in the fiery Afterscape of the Rapture.

  Stephen Colbert

  Country, Fall, America

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• Jesus' simple poetic words are delivered casually and gently. Jesus prefers to explain a difficult concept over time, never talking down to His followers, patiently letting the words soak in until they understand them fully.

  Roma Downey

  Simple, Talking, Followers

  Mark Burnett, Roma Downey (2013). “A Story of God and All of Us”, p.243, Hachette UK

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• I used to have to do readings in church, and it was terrifying. I would never have my glasses. The words are printed so small even Superman would be nervous. And you’re reading from the Bible. It’s not like you can just make something up and improvise. “A reading from the letter of Saint Paul to the Corinthians. Uhhh. Dear Corinthians, … How was your weekend? Sure is hot here. Uh, tell Jesus ‘Hey.’ This is the word of the Lord.

  Jim Gaffigan

  Reading, Weekend, Glasses

  Jim Gaffigan (2013). “Dad Is Fat”, p.169, Crown Archetype

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• Sorry, Jesus, I have to curse!

  Chynna Phillips

  Sorry, Curse

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• If we're all God's children, what's so special about Jesus?

  Jimmy Carr

  Funny, Children, Humor

  "Comedy Central Presents: Jimmy Carr". TV Series, www.imdb.com. 2005.

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• I get scared to death when I see people who say they've found Jesus Christ, and they're out there, and I wonder, who's teaching them? Who's mentoring them?

  Willie Aames

  Teaching, People, Mentor

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• I want kids to understand that strength doesn't come from what goes on around you. It comes from inside you, and that comes from Jesus Christ.

  Willie Aames

  Kids, Goes On, Want

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• I'm not pretty. The truth is I didn't think I could be a model at all. I was looking at some of the guys on the walls at Irene Marie and I thought to myself 'Jesus Christ. I can't do this. I don't look anything like these guys'.

  Channing Tatum

  Wall, Truth, Thinking

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• The milk of kindness flows through my body, I shall follow Jesus to the Taco Bell and give thanks.

  Aretha Franklin

  Kindness, Giving, Taco Bell

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• I think Jesus was a compassionate, super-intelligent gay man who understood human problems.

  Elton John

  Inspirational, Motivational, Gay

  "Elton John: 'There's A Lot Of Hate In The World'". Interview with Dotson Rader, parade.com. February 17, 2010.

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• I felt unworthy to play Jesus. I just accepted the responsibility and said, 'What actor wouldn't want to play this role?'

  Jim Caviezel

  Responsibility, Play, Roles

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• If your soul needs healing, the prescription you need is not Chuck Norris' tears, it's Jesus' blood.

  Chuck Norris

  Healing, Blood, Soul

  "Biography/ Personal Quotes". www.imdb.com.

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• I just want to say, that if Jesus were alive, what would he be doing? Well, he would probably be accepting and loving people how they're made. And I always say this and it's really the truth. If being 4'11 was a sin, what would I do? Well, I could wear heels and I could add a wig.

  Kristin Chenoweth

  People, Add, Wigs

  "Joy Behar's Inner Rosie: Conservative Pols Who 'Use' Christianity Have 'Same Syndrome' as 9/11 Terrorists". Interview with Joy Behar, www.newsbusters.org. September 18, 2011.

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• I am a Christian and I don't want there to be any confusion about what I believe or who I am. I don't believe gay people are going to hell. I believe that judgment is left to the one upstairs and I believe Jesus is all about love. If I can live my life even just a smidgen the way God made his son for us as an example, I'm happy. I do not judge other people for what they believe, but for me, this is what works.

  Kristin Chenoweth

  Christian, Believe, Son

  Biography/Personal Quotes, www.imdb.com.

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• Two thousand years ago Jesus is crucified, three days later he walks out of a cave and they celebrate with chocolate bunnies and marshmallow Peeps and beautifully decorated eggs. I guess these were things Jesus loved as a child.

  Billy Crystal

  Easter, Children, Years

  Billy Crystal (2013). “Still Foolin' 'Em: Where I've Been, Where I'm Going, and Where the Hell Are My Keys?”, p.36, Macmillan

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• I learned courage from Buddha, Jesus, Lincoln, Einstein, and Mr. Cary Grant.

  Peggy Lee

  Grants

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• My inspiration comes from that and so I wrote ‘Killing Jesus,’ because I think I was directed to write that.

  Bill O'Reilly

  Inspiration, Writing, Thinking

  "The Gospel according to Bill O'Reilly?". "60 Minutees" with Norah O'Donnell, www.cbsnews.com. September 29, 2013.

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• I was in a coma for five days - I was dead longer than Jesus before he was raised from the dead.

  Rik Mayall

  Raised, Coma, Five

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• I don't mean to toot my own horn, but if Jesus Christ lived in Chicago today, and he had come to me and he had five thousand dollars, let's just say things would have turned out differently.

  Richard Gere

  Mean, Chicago, Dollars

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• With just a little love and a little caring, I have seen kids totally turn around. Where you can't find any cancer at all anymore in their body. I've done it a lot of times. I'm not trying to say I'm Jesus Christ. We should just give a little more attention to the power of love and caring and faith and prayer.

  Michael Jackson

  Prayer, Cancer, Kids

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