My mother told me that niceness and kindness goes a long way.
The weight of the world isn't on their shoulders as much in Canada as opposed to America. Americans' perception of it is, "Oh, it seems like a pretty nice place to live. And everyone there is nice. So if people around you are nice, you have a tendency to be nicer." What a wonderful lesson for the rest of the world: Just let a little kindness rub off on you.
A key ingredient to success, I learned, is relying on not only the kindness of strangers, but the kindness of colleagues.
Art and the triumph of the human spirit - the two combined thrill me. It's the "Braveheart" moment, the stuff Joseph Campbell talks about, "the heroes journey," a beautiful documentary on a poignant topic, the fireman saving a kitten from a burning building. It's the combo of heroism and kindness against the odds or even good reason. It implies immortality because it is the domain of the soul. That evidence of the spirit of life is what makes me get out of bed in the morning.
I live in New York City, but it doesn't matter if you're in any large, metropolitan area, there's kind of a little bit of survival-of-the-fittest, so when you encounter kindness or people going out of their way in an empathetic way, it's almost startling.
Growing up I couldn't always get involved with the activities with all the other kids because if I overworked my body it would trigger my pain. There were definitely times growing up, where other kids wanted to challenge me; they wanted to see if they could push my buttons and see if I could fight or what have you. Taking my kindness for weakness or taking my quietness and laid-back style for weakness. I've been dealing with that for basically all my life.
Codex Orféo is something you won't see coming at you, but it does. It's all about kindness to other species, and to one another. If we can work that out, the world will take care of herself.
I'm always satisfied with going to soup kitchens or homeless shelters. A big one for me is children's hospitals. I love spending time with kids, rooting for them, making them laugh. Any small act of kindness is just as important as a donation. So volunteer. Go out there and see how you can make a difference and help someone.
There is nothing more important to our survival, nothing more dignified than learning how to take care of others, how to serve and teach people with kindness and openness. Mothers are experts in these fields. I hope people can learn to listen to them, learn to be like them and acknowledge the wisdom there before it is too late. I hope people can learn how to serve others.
We need to teach our youth American values, kindness, honesty,respect.
We say we embrace humanity, but what does that mean? We are all defined by our limits, so to what extent can we embrace all this? Because we all contain within ourselves equally the capacity for kindness, as much as for cruelty or evil. And the best of us are able to suppress those baser impulses, instincts. That's the war within.
I had no ambitions to become an actor, whatsoever. I was just waiting for my films to get made and some friends of mine, out of the kindness of their hearts, because I was sitting around doing nothing, started casting me in small roles and the roles got bigger.
I sometimes think about that, when I finish in something big I find it even hard, I feel like I lose an actual noticeable percentage of my reading time. Even on the reader end I find it so hard when a book that I love so much ends, to find the kindness to enter into a new one. Do you know what I'm saying? To find my way in, I feel like even there's that space after. I just love inhabiting a book that hits right.
I think we underestimate the importance of kindness sometimes. We understand the power of just a little tiny bit of kindness. It could be the catalyst for something so important. Sometimes just a tiny little gesture or an acknowledgment can make all the difference in turning somebody's life around. I think it has a trickle down effect, when you pass on what you receive without even knowing it. We also underestimate our own power to make a difference with the decisions that we make, every day.
Look at the great athletes, musician, artists, and writers. They all tap into a source. Some call that source God or soul or spirit or consciousness. The Seven Faces of Intention: creativity, kindness, love, beauty, expansion, abundance, and receptivity. And all seven are expressions of what I imagine that source to look like. The very fact that we exist is proof to me that the nature of that source is creative at its core. And there isn't a person reading this who does not have a gnawing sense inside that there's something they're here to do, something creative.
Choosing to be kind is also a choice to make the Power of Intention active in your life. The beneficial effects of kindness on the immune system and the increased production of serotonin have been proven. Conversely, unkindness weakens the body and puts us into a state of dissonance. So extend acts of kindness; ask for nothing in return.
We're all saints! We all have built into us this intention, the capacities for kindness and creativity and beauty. It's a matter of perspective. As Einstein said, "The single most important decision any of us will ever make is whether or not to believe that the universe is friendly." It's your choice.
For every act of violence and messiness there are a million acts of kindness and goodness. It just depends where you look. And when I look around at virtually anyone or anything on the planet, I can see another face of intention - beauty.
I try to stop myself from getting frustrated. I'm not a hundred percent successful, but I'm a thousand times better than I used to be. Anyone who's angry, nasty or rude is really offering a plea to be loved. I play a game with myself, trying to convert them from what I call low-energy emotions that drain us - frustration, irritation, anger and impatience - into high-energy emotions that sustain us - love, caring, kindness.
In the recovery movement, they call what I'm talking about letting go and letting God. If you're uncomfortable with the word God, just add an o and make it Good. The two words are interchangeable. It just means allowing this divine source of kindness, beauty and creativity to be the dominant force in your life - whatever you're doing. I truly believe that God writes all the books and builds all the bridges. Sure, I sit down for six or seven hours a day with my pen and pads - but the message moves though me and I just allow.
I found incredible kindness, dignity and hospitality in both Iraq and Afghanistan - am only alive because of it - the most worthwhile lesson of a twenty month walk to these countries was a deepening appreciation of the kindness of strangers.
I have never been able to let Iraq go. It is a part of me. Even under Saddam Hussein, even despite what the country went through, and despite how violent and tribal it can be, there is still a certain purity to the kindness of the population.
Every day, do something selfless for someone else that takes under five minutes. The essence of this thing you do should be that it makes a big difference to the person receiving the gift. Usually these favors take the form of an introduction, reference, feedback, or broadcast on social media. Do something that's not for yourself, every single day. Expect nothing in return. Over time, these random acts of kindness will really add up.
My book is going to be called Against Empathy, which may give you a feeling for where my argument is going to go. Whenever I talk about this, I have to begin in the most boring of all possible ways: by defining my terms. By "empathy," some people mean everything that is good - compassion, kindness, warmth, love, being a mensch, changing the world - and I'm for all of those things. I'm not a monster.
We can sit here and talk about all the negativity, which we've done a little bit, but for every act of evil in the world, there are a million acts of kindness. Basically, our nature is to love each other and care about each other, and most of us do that. Most of us have no quarrel with anybody who's living on another side of the planet and who might have a different religious persuasion. It's just these small minorities to the far right and the far left who get all of the news time and print space.
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