Norm MacDonald Quotes - Page 6

Quotes about:

• The Rolling Stones reunited for a twenty-fifth anniversary tour last week. Keith Richards said that he's happy to continue to do what he's been doing for the past twenty-five years: cheating death.

  Norm MacDonald

  Death, Cheating, Past

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• Love is an artful arrangement of artless pretensions, whereby we labor to appear innocent in what we desire to be most cunning.

  Norm MacDonald

  Love, Desire, Innocent

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• I don't have any ego about it, but I find there's not a great work ethic in show business. A lot of people are in it to make money, and coming from stand-up, you have to work so hard because almost nothing works, and if you lose the audience for three minutes, you're dead.

  Norm MacDonald

  People, Work Ethic, Ego

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• It is the folly of weak-minded people, to imagine they are what flattery or conceit represents them; and that it is useless for them to be what they are not, since they seem already to have acquired the reputation of it.

  Norm MacDonald

  People, Useless, Reputation

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• I can't be naturalistic enough to make it sound real. So instead, I just wander around aimlessly knowing that I'll be funny enough with stream of consciousness until I get to the actual explosively funny part.

  Norm MacDonald

  Real, Knowing, Sound

  Interview with Steve Heisler, tv.avclub.com. April 12, 2011.

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• This is a thing I read by a scientist... it said scientists now say that a man thinks about sex once every 7.3 seconds. Now, I know what I think every 7.3 seconds. It's just a bunch of meaningless gibberish.

  Norm MacDonald

  Sex, Men, Thinking

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• Pulp Fiction is a, uh, gritty, urban satire. Pump Friction is a uh-uh, a bunch of uh, dudes and ladies having dirty sex.

  Norm MacDonald

  Sex, Dirty, Fiction

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• I've shown people Richard Pryor who've never seen him, and most of them don't like him.

  Norm MacDonald

  People

  Interview with Steve Heisler, tv.avclub.com. April 12, 2011.

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• The character of giving advice often makes us accountable for the conduct of those we advise.

  Norm MacDonald

  Character, Giving, Advice

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• I guess [Richard] Pryor was that good. I never saw him in a theater, but I imagine he was that good, because he was such a phenomenal actor.

  Norm MacDonald

  Actors, Saws, Imagine

  Source: www.avclub.com

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• A capacity for hating the object of desire is, perhaps, the best cure for love in cases of disappointment.

  Norm MacDonald

  Love, Disappointment, Hate

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• I had a show that people thought used a laugh track. It wasn't; it was the real audience going crazy after everything that resembled a joke, that they could technically call a joke.

  Norm MacDonald

  Crazy, Real, Laughing

  Interview with Steve Heisler, tv.avclub.com. April 12, 2011.

  4 Copy quote

• I would love to stay at SNL forever. But you can't stay in the same place. People think you're a loser.

  Norm MacDonald

  Thinking, People, Forever

  "Personal Quotes/ Biography". www.imdb.com.

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• The vanity of being asked advice often makes us confirm the opinion of those that consult us.

  Norm MacDonald

  Vanity, Advice, Opinion

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• I've been in theaters. Like Brian Regan, who I love - loved him so much more when he did the Improvs. And then in a big theater - nobody's that good.

  Norm MacDonald

  Theater, Bigs, Brian

  Interview with Steve Heisler, tv.avclub.com. April 12, 2011.

  5 Copy quote

• I don't have to meet actors. I'm really blessed that I don't have to do all that horseshit.

  Norm MacDonald

  Blessed, Actors

  Interview with Steve Heisler, tv.avclub.com. April 12, 2011.

  4 Copy quote

• It's a very odd thing with Hollywood, where you do stand-up, you're good at it, then they go, "How would you like to be a horrible actor?" Then you say, "All right, that sounds good. I'll do that."

  Norm MacDonald

  Sound, Hollywood, Odd Things

  Interview with Steve Heisler, tv.avclub.com. April 12, 2011.

  4 Copy quote

• There hasn't been an original voice in stand-up since Sam Kinison.

  Norm MacDonald

  Voice, Originals

  Interview with Steve Heisler, tv.avclub.com. April 12, 2011.

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• Generally I don't like traveling around saying the exact same thing. I don't think that's a very good thing to do with your life.

  Norm MacDonald

  Thinking, Good Things, Very Good

  Interview with Steve Heisler, tv.avclub.com. April 12, 2011.

  4 Copy quote

• There's no such thing, of course, as an old-fashioned gay guy. They're the most decadent people.

  Norm MacDonald

  Gay, People, Guy

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• Whenever I do theaters, I don't like 'em. I don't think they're right for stand-up.

  Norm MacDonald

  Thinking, Ems, Theater

  Interview with Steve Heisler, tv.avclub.com. April 12, 2011.

  4 Copy quote

• I started on 'Saturday Night Live' the same time Conan started on 'Late Night.' We just had a relationship because I would be upstairs in the studio and whenever he couldn't get a guest - which was often back then since he was just starting out - he would just call me down to be a guest.

  Norm MacDonald

  Night, Would Be, Guests

  Interview with Andy Seifert, www.avclub.com. May 14, 2010.

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• Never raise expectations in others that you cannot realize: promise is less pleasing than disappointment is vexatious.

  Norm MacDonald

  Disappointment, Expectations, Promise

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• Last Christmas, I got the worst gift a guy ever gave me. He gave me a lottery ticket... what's the guy even thinking there. Here you go... nothing! Merry Christmas! It's nothing!

  Norm MacDonald

  Merry Christmas, Thinking, Guy

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• If you're watching a comedian on television and he's making a political point, I would say he's gotten too serious.

  Norm MacDonald

  Political, Comedian, Television

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