Diapers Quotes - Page 5

• When you have kids, there's no such thing as quality time. There's just time. There's no, 'Ooh, his graduation's better than going to the mall.' It's all kind of equal. Changing her diaper and her winning a contest - it's all good.

  Chris Rock

  Fathers Day, Dad, Kids

  "Sweetest Quotes from Hollywood Dads" by Luchina Fisher, abcnews.go.com. June 15, 2014.

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• People often ask me, "What's the difference between couplehood and babyhood?" In a word? Moisture. Everything in my life is now more moist. Between your spittle, your diapers, your spit-up and drool, you got your baby food, your wipes, your formula, your leaky bottles, sweaty baby backs, and numerous other untraceable sources-all creating an ever-present moistness in my life, which heretofore was mainly dry.

  Paul Reiser

  Baby, Children, Humorous

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• I've dug so deep into his background, I can practically tell you when he stopped waring diapers.

  C.C. Hunter

  Backgrounds, I Can

  C. C. Hunter (2012). “Whispers at Moonrise”, p.404, St. Martin's Griffin

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• I was the oldest of the children in my family. I had to do a lot of diaper-changing and lunch-making. I was taking my little sister to ballet, picking up my brother, sort of being a super-nanny.

  Vin Diesel

  Brother, Children, Lunch

  "Vin Diesel: I Want To Be A Good Dad". "Parade" Interview, parade.com. August 25, 2008.

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• I don't believe in that kind of American John Wayne individualism where people pull themselves up by their bootstraps. Someone changed your diapers. And if that's the case, you ain't self-made.

  Michael Eric Dyson

  Believe, Self, People

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• A story: A man fires a rifle for many years, and he goes to war. And afterward he turns the rifle in at the armory, and he believes he’s finished with the rifle. But no matter what else he might do with his hands, love a woman, build a house, change his son’s diaper; his hands remember the rifle.

  Anthony Swofford

  War, Believe, Son

  Anthony Swofford (2008). “Jarhead: A Solder's Story of Modern War”, p.126, Simon and Schuster

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• When the baby is older take the diapers off, my girl is gonna do the Slop.

  Chubby Checker

  Girl, Baby, Dancing

  Song: The Slop

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• In less than a year, the Bush administration will strut out of office, leaving the country in roughly the same condition a toddler leaves a diaper.

  Graydon Carter

  Country, Years, Office

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• Well, Rush, look what happened? 9/11 happened, and we didn't know it in advance. That's right, we got hit, we got hit big time. We need a new agency to make sure it doesn't happen again, Rush." And that was the excuse for starting Department of Homeland Security. The government grows and grows and grows and grows, and what do we get? Little old ladies wanded, scanned for bombs and weapons under their skirts next to the incontinence diapers. A bunch safer.

  Rush Limbaugh

  Agency, Government, Needs

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• A word to the wise to all the children of the twentieth century, whether their concern be pediatrics or geriatrics, whether they crawl on hands and knees and wear diapers or walk with a cane and comb their beards. There's a wondrous magic to Christmas, and there's a special power reserved for little people. In short, there's nothing mightier than the meek, and a merry Christmas to each and all.

  Rod Serling

  Wise, Children, Merry Christmas

  "The Twilight Zone: The Night of the Meek". TV Series, www.imdb.com. 1960.

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• Winning the green jacket is great - I can pay for all the diapers I'm going to have to get.

  Bubba Watson

  Winning, Green, Pay

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• As an older dad who grew up in a rural culture in the South, certain things were expected of women, and that included raising the children. But I think its just as important for the father to give the baths, to hug, to change the diapers, to tell the stories.

  Clyde Edgerton

  Children, Dad, Father

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• I suffered from a mild case of postpartum depression after my second child and the physical challenge of maintaining an overnight shift at CBS, a marriage, and two in diapers made the symptoms worse and everyone in the house paid the price.

  Mika Brzezinski

  Children, Two, House

  "Work And Babies: Women Still Have To Pick Their Poison (But Men Are Evolving!)" by Mika Brzezinski, www.huffingtonpost.com. March 18, 2010.

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• There are many people writing songs. That is absolutely wonderful. Who knows, there may be some kid in diapers and he or she might succeed in capturing in a few dozen words what great writers have spent years trying to say. Just the right word in the right place with the right melody behind it and the right rhythm. It might get around the world inch by inch, and people realize that this world is in danger, that we're in danger. That's the way "This Land Is Your Land" got to be so well known.

  Pete Seeger

  Song, Kids, Writing

  Source: www.wholeearth.com

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• Every time I think about changing a diaper, I run a little bit harder and a little bit faster to make sure I can afford a nanny until my daughter's old enough to take care of that herself.

  Charles Barkley

  Basketball, Daughter, Running

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• I autograph a lot of body parts of intoxicated people. And lots of shoes. And I signed a diaper once!

  Carrie Underwood

  Shoes, People, Body

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• Being a mother is the perfect experience for any writer. You learn how to not waste time. The writing hours become incredibly precious and concentrated because the rest of your day is completely packed with diapers, edible liquid foods that look like pooh, tiny bathtubs, and unconditional love.

  Chiara Barzini

  Mother, Writing, Unconditional Love

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• [Crisco] ain't just for frying. You ever get a sticky something stuck in your hair,like gum?...That's right, Crisco. Spread this on a baby's bottom, you won't even know what diaper rash is...shoot, I seen ladies rub it under they eyes and on they husband's scaly feet...Clean the goo from a price tag, take the squeak out a door hinge. Lights get cut off, stick a wick in it and burn it like a candle....And after all that, it'll still fry your chicken.

  Kathryn Stockett

  Baby, Husband, Eye

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• But playing your music as loud as you want and coming home drunk aren't real life. Real life, it turns out, is diapers and lawnmowers, decks that need painting, a wife that needs to be listened to, kids that need to be taught right from wrong, a checkbook, an oil change, a sunset behind a mountain, laughter at a kitchen table, too much wine, a chipped tooth, and a screaming child.

  Donald Miller

  Laughter, Children, Real

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• Having twin girls is a life changer - that's for sure. But I like getting up and changing diapers. It's the things you do.

  Roger Federer

  Girl, Twins

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• You walk like a duck with a wet diaper on.'' Anita Blake Vampire Hunter

  Laurell K. Hamilton

  Ducks, Vampire, Hunters

  Laurell K. Hamilton (2002). “Guilty Pleasures: An Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter Novel”, p.145, Penguin

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• He felt around desperately for a weapon. What did he have? Diapers? Cookies? Oh, why hadn't they given him a sword? He was the stupid warrior, wasn't he? His fingers dug in the leather bag and closed around the root beer can. Root beer! He yanked out the can shaking it with all his might. "Attack! Attack!" he yelled.

  Suzanne Collins

  Stupid, Beer, Warrior

  Suzanne Collins (2011). “Gregor the Overlander Collection:”, p.119, Scholastic Inc.

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• Yes, you make yourself useful, angel boy. Meanwhile, I’ll be in the bathroom.” William’s jet-black hair was dripping wet and plastered to his face. There was a fluffy white towel wrapped around his waist, displaying muscles that rivaled Paris’s own, and a tattooed treasure map that led to his man junk. Looking at his, you could see the makings of a temper so savage anyone who miraculously survived an encounter with him would end up needing therapy. And diapers. “I’ve got to finish deep conditioning my hair.” Or maybe not so savage.

  Gena Showalter

  Angel, Boys, Men

  Gena Showalter (2014). “Lords of the Underworld Collection 3: The Darkest Secret\The Darkest Surrender\The Darkest Seduction”, p.1075, Harlequin

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• Snap judgments? I'd gotten over those about the time I was toilet trained. Swore off diapers and faith in the human experience all in one week.

  Rob Thurman

  Snap Judgment, Toilets, Week

  Rob Thurman (2006). “Nightlife”, p.42, Penguin

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• You will be at your best forever, Even now you have good moments. Occasional glimpses of your heavenly self. When you change your baby's diaper, forgive your boss's temper, tolerate your spouse's moodiness, you display traces of saintliness.

  Max Lucado

  Baby, Self, Boss

  Max Lucado (2011). “Live Loved: Experiencing God's Presence in Everyday Life”, p.94, Thomas Nelson Inc

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