I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.
Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.
Political language... is designed to make lies sound truthful and murder respectable, and to give an appearance of solidity to pure wind.
In order to become the master, the politician poses as the servant.
Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to somebody else.
The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets.
A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country.
The spirit of resistance to government is so valuable on certain occasions that I wish it to be always kept alive.
The illegal we do immediately. The unconstitutional takes a little longer.
Public sentiment is everything. With public sentiment, nothing can fail. Without it, nothing can succeed.
An honest politician is one who when he is bought will stay bought.
It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong.
Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.
Practical politics consists in ignoring facts.
We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office.
Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.
Why, of course, the people don't want war.
When bad men combine, the good must associate; else they will fall one by one, an unpitied sacrifice in a contemptible struggle.
Always vote for principle, though you may vote alone.
The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.
You can always count on Americans to do the right thing - after they've tried everything else.
This country has gotten where it is in spite of politics, not by the aid of it. That we have carried as much political bunk as we have and still survived shows we are a super nation.
The false notion that democracy means that my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.
Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated.
There ought to be one day - just one - when there is open season on senators.
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