If you tell me how you get your feeling of importance, I'll tell you what you are.
Your thoughts make you what you are; by changing our # thoughts we can change our lives.
Practice, practice, practice in speaking before an audience will tend to remove all fear of audiences, just as practice in swimming will lead to confidence and facility in the water. You must learn to speak by speaking.
A good deed, "said the prophet Mohammed, "is one that brings a smile of joy to the face of another." Why will doing a good deed every day produce such astounding efforts on the doer? Because trying to please others will cause us to stop thinking of ourselves: the very thing that produces worry and fear and melancholia.
Arouse in the other person an eager want.
I honestly believe that this is one of the greatest secrets to true peace of mind -- a decent sense of values. We could annihilate 50 percent of all our worries at once if we would develop a sort of private gold standard -- a gold standard of what things are worth to us in terms of our lives.
It was this desire for a feeling of importance that led an uneducated, poverty-stricken grocery clerk to study some law books he found in the bottom of a barrel of household plunder that he had bought for fifty cents. You have probably heard of this grocery clerk. His name was Lincoln.
Remember that the people you are talking to are a hundred times more interested in themselves and their wants and problems than they are in you and your problems.
Begin with praise and honest appreciation. Call attention to people's mistakes indirectly. Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person. Ask questions instead of giving direct orders. Make the fault easy to correct. Make the other person happy about doing what you suggest.
Most people don't remember names, for the simple reason that they don't take the time and energy necessary to concentrate and repeat and fix names indelibly in their minds. They make excuses for themselves; they are too busy.
You and I are standing this very second at the meeting place of two eternities: the vast past that has endured forever, and the future that is plunging on to the last syllable of recorded time. We can't possible live in either of those eternities - no, not even for a split second. But, by trying to do so, we can wreck both our bodies and our minds. So let's be content to live the only time we can possible live: from now until bedtime.
Each party should gain from the negotiation.
Merely stating a truth isn't enough. The truth has to be made vivid, interesting, dramatic. You have to use showmanship.
Flattery is telling the other person precisely what he thinks about himself.
There is only one way under high heaven to get anybody to do anything. Did you ever stop to think of that? Yes, just one way. And that is by making the other person want to do it.
Always avoid the acute angle.
So, to prevent fatigue and worry, the first rule is: Rest often. Rest before you get tired.
An effective speaker knows that the success or failure of his talk is not for him to decide - it will be decided in the minds and hearts of his hearers.
Names are the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
Don't you have much more faith in ideas that you discover for yourself than in ideas that are handed to you on a silver platter?
Life is bigger than processes and overflows and dwarfs them.
Give your problem all the thought you possibly can before a solution is reached. But when the matter is settled and over with, worry not at all.
If your own mind is muddled, much more will the minds of your hearers be confused.
The expression a woman wears on her face is far more important than the clothes she wears on her back.
A talk is a voyage. It must be charted. The speaker who starts nowhere, usually gets there.
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