I think the Republican party should be placed in drydock and have the barnacles scraped off its bottom.
Too many of our countrymen rejoice in stupidity, look upon ignorance as a badge of honor. They condemn everything they don't understand.
If I had to live my life again, I'd make the same mistakes, only sooner.
All my life I've been terrible at remembering people's names. I once introduced a friend of mine as Martini. Her name was actually Olive.
My father warned me about men and booze but he never said anything about women and cocaine.
Fill what is empty, empty what is full, and scratch where it itches.
They aren't making mirrors like they use to.
I've tried several varieties of sex. The conventional position makes me claustrophobic, and the others either give me a stiff neck or lockjaw.
Only good girls keep diaries. Bad girls don't have time.
Say anything about me, darling, as long as it isn't boring.
I'm not childless, darling. I am childfree.
Nobody can be exactly like me. Sometimes even I have trouble doing it.
Bette [Davis] and I are good friends. There's nothing I wouldn't say to her face - both of them.
I've had a man and I've had a woman, and there's got to be something better.
If I were well behaved, I'd die of boredom.
Going down on a woman gives me a stiff neck, going down on a man gives me lockjaw and conventional sex gives me claustrophobia.
I have enemies I've never met - that's fame.
Cocaine isn't habit forming. I should know - I've been using it for years.
In my lifetime I've been to bed with men, women, and odd pieces of furniture.
The less I behave like Whistler's mother the night before, the more I look like her the morning after.
I read Shakespeare and the Bible, and I can shoot dice. That's what I call a liberal education.
They used to photograph Shirley Temple through gauze. They should photograph me through linoleum.
[To the man who came up to her at a party and exclaimed effusively, 'Tallulah! I haven't seen you for 41 years!':] I thought I told you to wait in the car.
Here's a rule I recommend: Never practice two vices at once.
I'll come and make love to you at five o'clock. If I'm late, start without me.
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