I was with a famous comedian when a young fan walked up and asked for an autograph. The comedian blew him off. I'll never forget the look on the young boy's face. He was devastated.
You are my superstar. I'm your number one fan, give me your autograph, sign it right here on my heart. Girl, I'll be your groupie, baby.
I get a lot of kids distracted. Sometimes they got to go cover left field, but they're over here talking to me, getting an autograph.
I had this grand idea that Elvira's kind of the Santa Claus of Halloween - at the malls, you'd have an Elvira there. Girls would dress as Elvira just like guys dress as Santa Claus, and it's not the real thing, but they'll pose for pictures, sign autographs. Of course, I couldn't go around to every mall, so we'd have to get more Elviras.
I sign every autograph I can for kids because I remember myself at that age. I think it's ridiculous that some guys won't sign for a kid.
I am always late because people stop me for autographs and say hi.
In Denmark lots of people come up to me for autographs.
Somebody will come up to me after a show and have me sign their arm, and the next time I see them my autograph has been permanently inscribed on their arm.
I truly respect the people who are working. If they want an autograph from Patti LaBelle, they are going to get it. I have never separated myself from them. I never think you are better than the next one.
A couple of girls I've signed autographs for have just cried or broken out into tears.
I was one of Them: the Strange Ones. The Funny People. The Odd Tribes of autograph collectors and photographers. The Ones who waited through long days and nights, who used other people's dreams for their lives.
I saw the lightnings gleaming rod. Reach forth and write upon the sky The awful autograph of God.
It's incredible when I'm out in these towns. I have people telling me they were waiting for hours just to meet me and get my autograph. I feel so guilty. I always feel like I have to give them more than just Kato Kaelin.
I think it's because if I have the time I take the time to sign every autograph I can after a show. I'll go out of my way when a lot of other guys wouldn't do this. Things like that create so much longevity in your career because that guy or girl you met that night will go home and talk about how cool Jeff Hardy was that night and then that makes their friends want to come out to the show next time you're in town.
My concerts consist of black, white, Korean - everybody. And the age group is so broad, from kids to great-grandparents. I have a lot of people with disabilities who come to my show as well. I personally move them to the front of the line because the lines for my autograph signings are so long. I make sure everybody has a good time at my show.
Having signed a few autographs in my time, I always wonder what the heck people do with them.
Seven years I worked at the Polish deli. It's a very slow deli. So I sat around a lot on my stool at the cashier. And I'd sign my autograph on all the bags I'd put the milk in. Just everyday, practice my autograph. And the manager of the store would take some of them and tape them against the wall. And he'd say, "Some day, I'm telling you, it will be worth something." And I'm like 13, going, "Really?!" And when I go back there, he still has them on the wall. It's very cute.
The first year was weird. I knew I was just there to talk to pitchers and not step on any toes. I could feel my adrenaline start to flow in about the sixth inning. I had to tell myself, "What the hell are you getting excited about? You're not going anywere, big boy. Just go sign some autographs." I was still programmed.
I have been sought out by a number of people who would have felt uncomfortable coming to a large public meditation. They don't want people to come up and ask for autographs.
I'll watch the kids play, have a big steak with my friends, stay in a nice hotel, sign a lot of autographs, then go back to Vegas and tell my alumni how tough recruiting is.
We are in the entertaining business, they want to get autographs, they want to take something home, whether it's a signed hat or, you know, program or whatever it might be.
I enjoy doing autograph sessions because I'm a people-watcher. I'm the guy in the airport who likes to just sit and watch people go by. So I enjoy just meeting people and hearing their stories.
I don't look at women as groupies. To me, a groupie is a stalker. If you're a fan, then you're a fan. But I can look at a woman and become a fan of hers instantly. I'll tell a woman, "Look, I don't want your phone number. Just give me your autograph. Can I take a picture with you?"
The same people that tell me what I ought to have is the same people asking for an autograph.
I love performing, signing autographs, taking 'selfies' with the fans. This is just what I feel like I was born to do.
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